Seven-year-old boy: Jonas Brothers! The Jonas Brothers can suck my ass!
Borders
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Amy D
Seven-year-old boy: Jonas Brothers! The Jonas Brothers can suck my ass!
Borders
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Amy D
Blonde wife: You do realize that our son is going to tell his schoolmates that Jesus is either a zombie or a vampire. Then we are going to have to explain to his teacher that we are Jewish.
Asian husband: And that you are just bad at explaining things?
Houston, Texas
Girl to friend: It’s really weird — every time I hang out with a guy, we end up having sex!
Angelo State University
San Angelo, Texas
Overheard by: adriana
Female grad student: The Americans with Disabilities Act reminds me of my Barbie dream house!
Grad school
Texas
Overheard by: Bean
Girl: Yeah, I need to talk to my advisor about changing my major. I want to be a space girl.
University of Texas, Austin’s Forty Acres bus
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: an engineer
Sorority girl: Guys! Anybody! Help! I just woke up on a couch and I can’t find my jacket, my purse, my shoes, my phone, my wallet, or my gays!
Sorority house
Texas
Preppy cutie, about steroided-up jock: Oh my god! He just winked at me!
Sarcastic friend: You sure it's not a twitch?
Preppie cutie: Your mom has a twitch! That's how she had you!
(friends stare)
Friend: What?!
El Paso, Texas
Overheard by:
Man to woman at post office: Oh, I must be hallucinating.
Post office lady: Congratulations, that's lovely.
Austin, Texas
Girl: And I was all “his mom is a slut” I mean, she sleeps with everyone.
Boy: Don't talk about my mom that way.
Girl: Why not? I mean, she's my mom, too.
Boy: No, she's not.
Girl: Well, you never know! You weren't there!
San Antonio, Texas
