Mom: Where do you think babies come from?
Two-year-old girl, matter-of-factly: Mexicans.
McDonald’s
Texas
Overheard by: GoHomeToYourBabies
Hot guy to hot girlfriend: I really liked it when you humped my face today… I think my nose even disappeared for a few seconds.
Whataburger
Plano, Texas
Overheard by: C.D.
Kid looking at periodic table of elements: Isn’t H2O up there somewhere?
Bowie High School
Austin, Texas
Drunk man on cell, poolside: Bro, there are like four hot chicks down here in bikinis, and they’re wasted! It’s like a movie or something!
Houston, Texas
Four-year-old girl: Mommy, I really think you’re over-analyzing this.
Dallas, Texas
Student to another: Well, maybe the urinal wanted to be dried. Did you ever think about that?
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Trying to Teach Here
Frat monkey: Here’s a naked pic of my girl [shows photo on cell]…
Drunk frat friend: Nice. [Pulls out his own cell.] Here’s a picture of my dick.
Caves Bar
Arlington, Texas
Overheard by: Not impressed
Four-year-old girl: You look like a hooker.
Young mom, laughing: That’s not very nice. Where did you learn that.
Four-year-old girl: Hooker, hooker, hooker.
Young mom, annoyed: You watch too much TV.
Dressing room
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Because that IS Barneys favorite word…
Little girl in shopping cart as dad pushes it away from the mom: We’re going to jettison mom! Woo-hoo!
Department store
Austin, Texas
Enthusiastic teen girl: My 10-year-old brother wears lip gloss!
Irritated mother: Don’t tell people that!
Line for American Idol auditions
Dallas, Texas