Teen girl #1: Oh my god! Really? Well, even though you’re three weeks late, you totally don’t have to worry until a month after you guys actually did it. So you’ve definitely got at least a week left until you need to start worrying.
Teen girl #2: … Really?
Teen girl #1: Yes, I’m completely sure. You’re totally fine. Golden. Except that you’re 17 and might be pregnant.
Dallas Airport
Dallas, Texas
Hoochie: I would never get my clit pierced there.
O’Bannon’s Bar
College Station, Texas
Guy riding in car with real estate agent: I think we’re looking for something– Dude those cats were humping!
Agent, to driver: Go back, go back!
Bedford, Texas
Overheard by: Tswerve
Girl on cell: … Funny like when you got crabs?
Frisco, Texas
Overheard by: Abs
Chick #1: Sarah took her retarded sister-in-law to the game last night. They ended up getting drunk and going to a strip club. She really is retarded.
Chick #2: Like, literally retarded?
Chick #1: Yeah.
Chick #2: Well, that sounds like an interesting night…
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Wish I could’ve been there
Girl #1: I just don’t think I’ll ever have sex without a condom.
Girl #2: Oh, please — that’s like saying you’re going to wait until marriage.
Mia’s Mexican Restaurant
Dallas, Texas
20-ish redhead: My life would have been so different if I had two gay dads.
20-ish brunette: They would have dressed you in ball gowns every day.
20-ish redhead: Can you imagine the Barbies I would have had?
20-ish brunette: Wow. You would have had all the Barbies.
20-ish redhead: Barbie would have come to my birthday parties.
20-ish brunette: Yes, but she would have been a man.
Houston, Texas
Hot guy to hot girlfriend: I really liked it when you humped my face today… I think my nose even disappeared for a few seconds.
Whataburger
Plano, Texas
Overheard by: C.D.
