Tourists

Tourist to park ranger: How do I get to Mt. Desert Island from here?
Park ranger: Ummm, you're standing on it.
Tourist: No, I'm not.
Park ranger: Yes, you are.
Tourist: This is ridiculous, I'm going to report you to the government.
Park ranger: No, really, you're on the island.

Mount Desert Island, Maine

Tourist: Are you a good Muslim or a bad Muslim?

Haunted Mansion, DisneyWorld
Orlando, Florida

Overheard by: Eric

Confused tourist lady, looking at anime convention kids in costume: Excuse me? Do you know what all of this is about?
Local: Yeah, the whack-job convention is in town.
Confused tourist lady: The…the…”whack-job” convention? (looks at costumes) Whack-jobs?
Local: (smacks forehead and turns away)

Washington, DC

Overheard by: Sarah Boyd

Indian tourist outside strip club: So you pay money, and a lady dances for you.
Mum: Well, that sounds delightful.

Whitechapel
London
England

Overheard by: Chinese cockney

American tourist to friends: I hope this park has shade and air conditioning.

Barcelona
Spain

Overheard by: Kate

40-something tourist woman: But is it beneficial for your toaster?
40-something tourist woman #2: Umm…do I really have to answer that?

Underground Mall
Montreal, Canadia

Overheard by: Yes, yes you do.

Canadian tourist girl #1: Wow! That's such a cool bridge!
Canadian tourist girl #2: Wow! It totally goes all the way across the river!

Millenium Bridge
London, England

Overheard by: Michael Oakes

Swedish tourist: We came here for the chicken, but will remember it for the toilets.

Swiss Chalet
Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Glad I didn't go downstairs…

American tourist: Where's north here?
Local Swedish friend: (points north)
American tourist: It seems north changes everywhere I go, in Hungary it was that way (points), in Aspen it was that way (points) and now in Sweden it's that way (points).
(Swede stares in disbelief)

Stockholm
Sweden

American tourist: Why did they put the castle so close to the airport?

Outside Windsor Castle
Windsor
England