Washington, DC

Professor, about megafauna: I would love to have a giant beaver.

GWU Archaeology lecture
Washington, DC

Student librarian on cell: Hey…who is this? Bill from architecture? Well, yeah, I remember writing my name on your arm, but I like don't remember why.

Music Library, Catholic University
Washington, DC

Overheard by: So much for quiet in the library…

Dude #1: I have a really bad headache.
Dude #2: You know what cures that? Sodomy!


Student: Professor, can you repeat that question?
Professor: I can’t remember! I just make this shit up.

American University
Washington, DC

Guy #1: ‘Drinking the Kool-Aid’ is such a misused phrase. It’s even become corporate speak. Don’t people realize that it’s a reference to the death of a thousand people?
Guy #2: Yeah, next thing you know they’ll be saying, ‘We’re going to offer a Holocaust of savings.’


Mom: No! Don't walk on that! (kid continues to walk on grass) I hope you step in dog shit.

Capitol Hill
Washington, DC

Overheard by: christa

Girl: Hey, what about that time we went duck hunting naked and…
Random passerby: That sounds like fun!

Washington, DC

Girl, frantically looking through fridge: Shit, I’m gonna be late for work… What the hell? Why is your rice in my freezer?
Boyfriend: Because then it will be happy and prosperous.

Washington, DC

Overheard by: Nic

Crazy blonde lady on park bench: Because they're all about gluttony. Plus, it's harder for them to get in if you're thin, because they're usually fat, you know? (two heavy ladies next to her nod)

Judiciary Square
Washington, DC

Chick: Guess who's a lesbian couple again instead of creepy incest twins!

Washington Monument
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Ladle