Girl: Woah, when did you get here?
Boy: Everywhere.
Girl: I asked when.
Boy: Oh. Uh. All the time.
Spokane, Washington
Girl: Woah, when did you get here?
Boy: Everywhere.
Girl: I asked when.
Boy: Oh. Uh. All the time.
Spokane, Washington
Lesbo to another: I know! And all I knew is that all I could smell was my best friend’s vagina.
Gay pride festival, Volunteer Park
Seattle, Washington
Customer: My therapist wants me to start thinking of men as friends. Seriously though, if you can’t fuck’em, what’s the point?
Espresso Drive Thru
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: The Barista Who Loves Her Job
Super drunk girls to random dude passing by: Could you take our picture?
Random dude: Sure, no problem! (pause) Three… Two… But try not to look too whorish…
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Offended on their behalf
Hobo: Fuck you, ya dirty fuckhole!
Male passerby: Wait — ‘fuckhole’? Is that, like, a cooch or an ass?
Hobo: Depends on if you’re gay or not. For you, it’s an ass.
Denny Way
Seattle, Washington
Tall, pale, blonde girl: And Joe and I realized that we are both ridiculously tall, blonde and blue-eyed. So Aryan. We're basically Hitler's wet dream.
Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Celessa
Woman #1: So, all these women are going skydiving now, because you can have an orgasm against the updraft.
Woman #2 (enthusiastically): Oh, that's great!
Olympic Sculpture Garden
Seattle, Washington
Professor: The emotional impact of one story is greater than the story of many people.
Student: Isn't that what Stalin said?
Professor: Um. Sort of the same sentiment. But I really hope that is my last parallel to Stalin.
Seattle, Washington
Little boy: Daddy, how are we going to get down?
Father: Parachutes.
Top of Space Needle
Seattle, Washington
Random smoker at party: If Jesus cockblocks me one more time, I am going to find where he lives!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
