Mental illnesses

Girl: Seriously, she’s completely obsessed. Like all of her final drawings were of his penis. Like all of them.

Roanoke, Virginia

Overheard by: Abbie

Mother, to three-year old in stroller: Oh, ha ha ha! You’re retarded.

Paducah, Kentucky

Student: I have this irrational fear of being clunked over the head and shipped to a country whose alphabet I don’t know, so I’m trying to learn all these alphabets… I must be paranoid, I don’t know.

Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: l_tau

College girl: Remember that girl who admitted to stealing my clothes from the laundry room?
Friend: Yeah?
College girl: Well, she finally gave me my clothes back at the end of the semester before she mysteriously disappeared. I was like going through them and I found not just my clothes, but like other people’s clothes too. Not just girls either. I found tighty-whities and shit. But the weirdest part was at the bottom of the basket. There was a plastic bag of jewelry ranging from like cheapo rhinestone shit to like semiprecious stones, a tv remote with no batteries, a crazy-straw, some masking tape, an empty lipstick tube thing, and a handful of Canadian money.

Newark, New Jersey

Guy: Come on! He’s only a little retarded.
Chick: I’m not going to sleep with him. Ever!

http://overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com/2007/03/its-illegal-anyway-right.html

Overheard by:

British woman: Ah, look, Dede’s eating a piece of paper.
American woman: I caught her eating a crayon today.
British woman: The other day she ate a piece of chalk during class. She’ll basically eat anything you give to her.

Volta School for the Mentally Handicapped
Gbi Kpendu, Volta Region
Ghana, West Africa

Crazy old white lady trying on wedding veil: So I always wondered why I didn't look good in these things…until 2004.
Disinterested customer: Oh?
Crazy old white lady: Yeah, then I found out I was part Native American. At least 5%.
Disinterested customer (confused): Oh…?
Crazy, old white lady: Yeah. That's why I don't look good in veils. Cause we Native Americans don't wear them.
Disinterested customer: I got married in a courthouse.
Crazy old white lady: I hate to say it since I am part white, but damn those white people!

Goodwill
Altoona, Pennsylvania

Student: Hey, sir, did you hear about James?
Teacher: No.
Student: He's got fifteen people living in his head. Want to join them?
Teacher: No, not a chance.

Bristol, Vermont

Overheard by: Misaki

Philosophy professor, proving his argument: Therefore, if I don’t get a little crazy, then I’m never gonna survive.

Michigan State University
Michigan

Overheard by: sjshock

Pretty girl to boyfriend: I don't know if I have too many toothpicks, or not enough.
Boyfriend: So this is where the crazy starts?

Grocery Store
Havelock, North Carolina