Colleges & Universities

Student #1: So you're only taking three credit hours this semester?
Student #2: Yeah. I figure as long as I take at least one class, I can live at home and mooch off of my mother indefinitely.
Student #1: You dreamed it, saw it and are going for it. Awesome, dude.

UCF
Orlando, Florida

Girl on cell: Yeah, he was there, and he brought the girl he cheated on me with. (long pause) It made the family dinner a little awkward.

Michigan State University

(two hipsters stare quizzically at short Chinese-American male)
Chinese-American male: No, what's confusing is I'm becoming Mormon and having a sex change.

UC Berkeley
Berkeley, California

Obnoxious student in scarf: He was chewing the umbilical cord like licorice.

UC Berkeley
Berkeley, California

Freshman girl: Why are we judging her for being crazy?
Freshman friend: Yeah, if we think you're crazy, then you definitely have problems.
Freshman girl: But I'm still pissed at her for taking the good side of the bed.

U of A Campus
Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: Alex

Organic chemistry professor: Let me show you guys what I like to do in my office, in private.

UC Berkeley
Berkeley, California

Bitchy student: So, are you still married?
Innocent victim: Yeah. Yeah I am!
Bitchy student: Uh huh. And just how long do you think that will last??

Kennesaw State University
Georgia

College girl #1: Have you ever smelled sweaty balls?
College girl #2 and #3: Oh my god! Yes, we were just talking about this yesterday.
College girl #4: No.
College girl #1: Really? Oh yeah…you don't like giving head.

University of South Florida

Girl talking to two people about to take a nap: I'm going to colonize your bodies when you sleep.

Dorm, UCSC
California

Overheard by: Derrick

Woman #1: You know what I learned the other day? Social Darwinism.
(awkward pause)
Woman #2: Really? How's that working for you?
Woman #1: Well, it sure explains a lot.

Library, Arcadia University
Glenside, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Xander