Math professor, after reading from textbook: I just lost all interest in life.
Portland, Oregon
Math professor, after reading from textbook: I just lost all interest in life.
Portland, Oregon
Male student: Sorry to use an STD metaphor again, but I think the bee pubic hair represented herpes.
Whittier College
Whittier, California
Overheard by: Sam (kind of hard not to)
Customer to cashier: A lot of people say the witching hour is midnight, but it's actually 3 am. I know this because I worship Satan.
Supermarket
Columbia, Missouri
Overheard by: RW
Professor just before class starts: There's no sporting events this weekend, right? We need something to bet on. (pause) I've got it! How about the hurricane?
CSU Classroom
Fort Collins, Colorado
College student: I may not know what I'm doing, but I know what I'm not doing.
Decatur, Illinois
Teenage girl to friends: So at first I just really liked him but now I think I love him!
Bored friend: Here comes the breakup.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: JDowntown
Guy giving out samples: Free sausage! Try some local sausage for free! Made right here in Seattle, no preservatives!
(people walk right past stand without looking)
Guy, in same tone of voice: I will figure out where you live and burn down your houses! Free sausage! Try a sample!
Pike Place Market
Seattle, Washington
Girl at bakery: Awwww…look at the puppy! Well, I don't know, it could just be a multiracial dog.
Dupont Circle
Washington, DC
Teen #1: And we can decorate it!
Teen #2: With glitter and sparkles?
Teen #1: Gawd, you are like a deprived five-year-old.
Fullerton, California
Overheard by: Does glitter make you younger?
Girl #1, with condom on hand: I don't know why men bitch about wearing these.
Girl #2: They say they don't feel “natural.”
Girl #1: Well, neither do my glasses, but I wear them 'cause I need to see.
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
