Construction workers

New homeowner: Did you ever find out what was causing that smell?
Worker: Yep.
New homeowner: What was it?
Worker: I’m not gonna tell ya.
New homeowner: Come on, what was it?
Worker, with a serious face and tone: You’ve got about four and a half to five opossums underneath your house.

Huntington, West Virginia

Overheard by: Jess

Construction worker yelling into manhole: As a matter of fact, I’m wearing a condom right now! Really! I put one on this morning.

10th and Pine
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Didn’t want to know

Lazy construction worker: Watch out, that stuff is hot!
Busy construction worker: It's okay, my fingers are used to the heat. I used to have habits.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Kendra

White construction worker yelling into house under construction: Hey Miguel, what are you listening to in there?
Miguel, yelling back: Bach's Goldberg Variations.
White construction worker, muttering: Crazy Mexican drywallers.

Longmont, Colorado

Overheard by: Landscaper

Hardhat telling story in falsetto voice: Leave me alone! I have a million things on my mind! [Switching to own voice] I’m like, ‘We haven’t had sex in weeks!’

Boston, Massachusetts

Drunk girl #1: (blows kiss to construction worker)
Drunk girl #2: You *so* just made his day!
Construction worker: Slut.

Exhibition Street
Melbourne, Australia

American construction worker: See, you escaped communism. All I ever did was join the disco demolition night at Comisky park.
Polish construction worker: I didn’t escape communism, I got kicked out. Big difference.

Chicago, Illinois

White construction worker: What was the name of Speedy Gonzales’ cousin? The slow one…
Mexican construction worker: Why?
White construction worker: Because I want to start calling you that…

Hamilton Street
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/03/too-stupid-to-be-racist.html

Overheard by: slowpoke rodriguez

Construction worker #1: So, Lou, how's that gay thing going for you?
Construction worker #2: Goin' pretty good, Al, goin pretty good.

West Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: keeeeem

Construction worker eating pizza: So basically, pizza is just glorified cheese on toast.

Hatton Garden
London
England

Overheard by: Katy Out To Lunch