Old lady to old man, as breakfast is served: Today has been an interesting day. Somebody ate half my pancake!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Old lady to old man, as breakfast is served: Today has been an interesting day. Somebody ate half my pancake!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Geek #1: So, was your mom a very loose woman when she was in college?
Geek #2: Well, not really, but back when she was in the military, she was.
Morgantown, West Virginia
Overheard by: Mint
Happy dad to little kid: Capital punishment is fun!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Fat female student: I’m thirty‐eight years old with a criminal justice degree, and I still can’t find nothin’ to do in this valley. Nobody’s hirin’, nothin’.
Skinny female student: Couldn’t you just be a cop?
Fat female student: I can’t be a cop. They give me a badge an’ a gun, I’d be shootin’ at fags and wetbacks. I mean, in this day in age… Not to be rude or anything…
Bookstore
West Virginia University
College guy #1: I can’t believe I wasn’t invited to the wedding.
College guy #2: Maybe if you’d eat another lizard.
Clancy’s Irish Pub
Keyser, West Virginia
Overheard by: Millicent Bystander
Lawyer to another: So, how much do you charge for a malicious wounding?
Party
Charleston, West Virginia
Guy: I was a dragon in my past life.
Girl: Did you have sex with other dragons?
Guy: Of course.
High School Gym
West Virginia
Overheard by: Kimber
Guy on headset: I’ll talk to you later. I hope your speech impediment improves.
Vienna, West Virginia
Guy to friend returning from bathroom: (distraught) But I wanted to be the one to do it with you! I wanted to be the one to do it with you!
Gables Night Club
Inwood West Virginia
Overheard by: joanna
Woman, trying to hush crying baby: Shhhhh… It’s okay.
College girl: Ma’am, I am prepared to set fire to your child.
Parkersburg, West Virginia
