Drunk man to man holding rolled-up newspaper: There's a kind of phallic-ness about it, a sort of masculine quality…
The Ship Inn, Southbank
Brisbane
Australia
Drunk man to man holding rolled-up newspaper: There's a kind of phallic-ness about it, a sort of masculine quality…
The Ship Inn, Southbank
Brisbane
Australia
Stoned frat boy: I have this aversion with talking to dentists… or really anyone who wants to help me with my general health.
SUNY Geneseo
New York
Overheard by: Jeni
Wife to husband: She said all they did Saturday night was go to the grocery store around 11:00 pm. And looked at all the condoms. She said that she didn't realize there were so many different kinds: red ones, black ones, ribbed, lubed, etc.
Gay guy at next table, overhearing: Jeez… I can remember when they only came in regular and mint flavored.
Restaurant
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: A. Nonymous
Gym teacher, during stretches: If you do it this way, it makes it easier and also more challenging.
Henry Wise Wood High School
Calgary
Canadia
black lady buying clothes at counter while her little girl (who looks about 5 years old) runs around store pulling clothes off their hangers…
Little girl: "damn mama, what taking you so long?"
Mother looks up to see her unruly child knocking merchandise onto the floor. She scowls and folds her arms across her chest. At the top of her lungs mother yells:
"girl, what is wrong wit you? Is you stupid?"
Shopping Mall in Chicago, IL
Overheard by: Blondie
Teen girl: Mom, guess what he got me for an early Christmas present?
Mother: What, honey?
Teen girl: A gas-mask bong–like in that movie Knocked Up. And it's purple!
Mother: Jeez, your dork-o-meter is in the red.
MARTA Train
Atlanta, Georgia
Student: Well, sometimes you ask questions that have answers that might not be the answer you are looking for!
Professor: Are you calling me fat?
Michigan State University, Michigan
Girl #1: So when is that thing you guys are doing?
Girl #2: Oh my god! You have to go! We're all going to get naked and walk around campus all day.
Girl #1: I honestly would, but I have tattoos in some really unconventional places.
Girl #2: Oh, I understand totally.
Chem Lab, William and Mary
Williamsburg, Virginia
Girl: I told him I didn't dance, because I didn't want to dance with him, but all these other guys asked me if I wanted to dance and I had to say no because I told him I didn't dance, but I really wanted to dance. So we have to go, so that I can dance.
Friend: So, did you dance with him?
Pasadena, California
Overheard by: needs new friends
