Mother to crying newborn: Wah, wah, wah! Your life is so hard!
Target
Australia
Little girl: What color is your bed?
Patient babysitter: Blue.
Little girl: What color is your bathroom?
Patient babysitter: Red.
Little girl: What color is your underwear?
Patient babysitter: Sweetie, I'm not telling you that!
Little girl: That's okay, I'll see it when you bend over.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Face
Mom: Oh, no… A dead chipmunk.
Small child: Yay! A dead chipmunk!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Tube train announcer: We're just waiting for a platform to come free at the next station. Thank you for your patience.
Small boy, thoughtfully: They don't *know* that we're being patient. We could all be banging on the windows and screaming.
Tube
London
England
Overheard by: Matt W
Young suit to crying baby he's holding at arm's length: You were a terrible investment.
Young woman: Stop saying that!
Young suit: If he doesn't stop crying, I'm literally going to give him to the next person who is willing.
Young woman, taking the baby: He should be crying. You're an idiot!
Young suit: The sale has now become two for one.
Toys R Us
Bear, Delaware
White Russian guy with slight accent: Something tells me my first born won't be white. That something is my penis.
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: The Sauce
Three-year-old boy: When I get older my penis is going to get so big, and then it will talk to me.
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Dr Banana Grabber
