Drunk girl: Oh my god, how can you be wearing a t-shirt right now? It’s so cold outside!
Bouncer: I love the cold. In fact, I have the air conditioning on in my apartment right now.
Drunk girl: Wow, so, what are you? Like, from Florida or something?
Bouncer: No… That doesn’t make any sense.
Washington Street
Brighton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Patron
Girl #1: I don't know if I want cookie dough, I'd rather make cookies.
Girl #2: Oh, man. It's totally carnal, the things I wanna do to that cookie dough. I want it on my face.
(five minutes later)
Girl #1: Okay, I want some cookie dough.
Girl #2: I thought you didn't want any!
Girl #1: You gave such a rave review of the cookie dough on your face that I entertained the possibility that I, too, might want it on my face.
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Lisa
Guy: Sometimes I feel like I want to get a steady girlfriend again.
Friend: Whenever I feel like that I just jerk off all over myself and the feeling goes away.
Downtown Post Office
Worcester, Massachusetts
Girl to friend: Your first time was a three-way?
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Soccer mom: I can't believe I was able to convince my husband that I was gay.
Museum of Fine Arts
Boston, Massachusetts
Teenage guy to another: Didn't they want to name their kid something weird, like “question mark?”
Brighton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: L-Dawg
Girl: Are you seriously telling me how I should masturbate? When did you become a sex tyrant?
MIT
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Greenpeace volunteer handing out pamphlets: Sir, do you want to help save the environment?
Suit: Absolutely not.
Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts
Black girl to white friends: Black people want to be country, but we don't want to listen to the music.
Harvard Yard
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: meems
White tourist: I’m really sorry — I don’t have any change. If I did, I’d give you some, but I don’t, so… sorry. Good luck with everything…
Black dude: Cracka, I’m ain’t homeless!
Hynes Convention Center subway stop
Boston, Massachusetts
