Philosophy professor, proving his argument: Therefore, if I don’t get a little crazy, then I’m never gonna survive.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Overheard by: sjshock
Philosophy professor, proving his argument: Therefore, if I don’t get a little crazy, then I’m never gonna survive.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Overheard by: sjshock
Pretty girl to boyfriend: I don’t know if I have too many toothpicks, or not enough.
Boyfriend: So this is where the crazy starts?
Grocery Store
Havelock, North Carolina
Math teacher: Use the ratio test if you can expect to cancel out many many factors, like a happy schizophrenic child flailing his factor-canceling-crowbar.
Philippines
Girl: I really like playing with grass…also, I think I’m going to crazy one day.
John Mayer Concert
Holmdel, New Jersey
College guy #1: I think racism is just really bad OCD!
College guy #2: Haha, yeah!
University of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Fashionable girl to singing man on bicycle: Excuse me, are you mentally ill or just musically inclined?
Düsseldorf
Germany
Overheard by: Anja Schwalm
Crazy old white lady trying on wedding veil: So I always wondered why I didn’t look good in these things…until 2004.
Disinterested customer: Oh?
Crazy old white lady: Yeah, then I found out I was part Native American. At least 5%.
Disinterested customer (confused): Oh…?
Crazy, old white lady: Yeah. That’s why I don’t look good in veils. Cause we Native Americans don’t wear them.
Disinterested customer: I got married in a courthouse.
Crazy old white lady: I hate to say it since I am part white, but damn those white people!
Goodwill
Altoona, Pennsylvania
Student: So, the only way they won’t kick me out of college is if I was diagnosed with a mental problem. Do you think I can pull off bipolar?
University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire
Obese middle-aged tourist to husband: I called him and told him we’re at passenger pick-up 2. He called and asked where we’d be, and I said passenger pick-up 2, that’s where he can find us. It’s just easier to find us when he gets here. Passenger pick-up 2. And it’s cold. That’s why I brought this vest. I brought this vest in case it got cold, and it got cold. I’m going to button it up. Did you hear me? I’m going to button it up. There, it’s buttoned. (husband ignores her)
Newark Airport, New Jersey
Overheard by: EthanK
Dude: I may be bipolar, but she’s fucking crazy!
650 NE Holladay Street
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Too Many Papercuts
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist