Professor: Sorry, I think I just gave a few of you post-traumatic Chaucer disorder.
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Professor: Sorry, I think I just gave a few of you post-traumatic Chaucer disorder.
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Customer: My therapist wants me to start thinking of men as friends. Seriously though, if you can’t fuck’em, what’s the point?
Espresso Drive Thru
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: The Barista Who Loves Her Job
Student: What are you eating?
Teacher: My bracelet… it’s made of anti-depressants.
Tucson, Arizona
Hobo, sitting next to guys on bench: And then my guys, damn birds! (mutters incoherently) Everywhere! Fucking pigeons! They eat and shit and live and shit. (mutters incoherently) Cats, and mind control, that's what we need…
(hobo gets up and rolls down the street)
Guy #1: What the fuck?
Guy #2: I think he's my hero.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Woman to friend: And her therapist is saying she doesn't need any more therapy sessions. I mean, she was cutting herself at camp a only month ago!
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/355805033/shell-be-perfect-for-a-band.html
Overheard by: not appropriate in the hardware store
Girl #1: So what are we looking for here?
Girl #2, distractedly: A birthday card for my boyfriend Tom*. (pauses) I mean…
Girl #1: Oh my god, you totally just called your best friend your boyfriend! If that's not a huge Freudian slip, I don't know what is.
Girl #2: Freud can suck my dick!
Culpeper, Virginia
Overheard by: freudian follower
Crazy guy: Hey, June*! Do you know that my cabinets keep opening and closing by themselves?
June*: Well, do you believe in ghosts?
Crazy guy: Yes, I do!
June*: Maybe your place is haunted, and the ghosts just want to say hello.
Crazy guy, after thinking a while: No, I think it's just my schizophrenia.
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Sweenan A. Mornstuy
Father: Sweetie, your affection for the dog is causing you to hallucinate.
Empress Pavillion
Chinatown, California
Overheard by: Yapplebee
Middle aged woman to another: It’s not the hot flashes that are so bad… It’s the depression.
BeauJo’s
Ft. Collins, Colorado
Overheard by: always listening
Dude: You fail to see that the rhinoceros is not pleased that you've clogged the bathtub drain with jam and celery. She's quite angry with you. I mean, if you just shit out a canary, it's not going to want to play tonsil hockey.
Friend: How hard would it be to get you involuntarily committed to a mental institution?
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
