Teacher: Well, what do you think it would be like if you had a penis on your forehead? What would you do if you saw a pretty girl?
Kodiak High School
Kodiak, Alaska
Teacher: Well, what do you think it would be like if you had a penis on your forehead? What would you do if you saw a pretty girl?
Kodiak High School
Kodiak, Alaska
Little girl: Wouldn’t it be great if, instead of stinging you, bees rescued you from quick sand?
Brookfield, Illinois
Overheard by: Joe V
Kid looking at periodic table of elements: Isn’t H2O up there somewhere?
Bowie High School
Austin, Texas
Mom: This is ridiculous! Why are you crying?
Wailing four-year-old: Because I have no reason left to live!
701 Russell Avenue
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Chef #1: So, were you on the old devil’s dandruff over the weekend? The old Colombian marching powder? [Chef #2 stares blankly and silently.] Is that a yes?
Belfast City Centre
United Kingdom
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: At the bowling alley!
Armor Road
North Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Caesar22
Girl: Yeah, there’s a Facebook group called ‘I’m a fermata, hold me.’
Professor: What?
Girl: You know, Facebook? YouTube?
Professor: What?!
Girl: You know, like, the Internet?
Professor: I know about the Internet! I know!
Sarah Lawrence College
New York
Guy #1: Okay, sure — you can use a transporter to beam your body down to another planet, but what happens to your soul?
Guy #2: Yeah…
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Paul Cowling
Angry woman on phone: Well, did you let Grandpa out of the cage?!
Venice, Florida
Overheard by: inyourendo
Student to another: Well, maybe the urinal wanted to be dried. Did you ever think about that?
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Trying to Teach Here
