Guy: If you bang a girl unprotectedly, you have to keep banging her protectedly to make sure she doesn't start showing.
Allston, Massachusetts
Guy: If you bang a girl unprotectedly, you have to keep banging her protectedly to make sure she doesn't start showing.
Allston, Massachusetts
Botany professor, lecturing on plant reproduction: Now, I'm sure you all know plenty about sex in humans by now. (pause) Because of the Ontario school system. (pause) And…stuff.
University of Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: The Shrew
Black girl #1: He made me a BLT with avocado.
Black girl #2: And then he passed out?
Black girl #1: No. First, I told him to bang me like a screen door in a hurricane, then he passed out.
Black girl #2: You're always stressing out that skinny white boy.
Black girl #1: Haha, yeah. I should marry him.
Bridgeport, Connecticut
Annoyed guy: You want me to talk to you during sex?! Let’s do it on the kitchen counter! That way I can make you an omelet, too, while we’re at it!
Cypress Run apartments
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: likes it in the kitchen
Dude #1: Hey man, wanna go get some things pregnant?
Dude #2: Um. What? What kind of things?
Dude #1: Just stuff. Whatever we find.
http://www.overheardatumbc.com
Curly-haired brunette: So how many sex partners did you say you'd had?
Straight-haired brunette: I think I said ten.
Curly-haired brunette: That's cool.
Straight-haired brunette: Ten in the past year, I mean. Obviously.
Curly-haired brunette, laughing: Obviously! I've seen you having sex with more people than that.
Vallejo Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Poogs McNasty
Girl to friend: You know what I was thinking? We always say girls who get pregnant are white trash. But I really thought about this, and we have sex. We could get pregnant. You're not white trash!
College
New Jersey
Guy: Look! A squirrel!
Girl: Awww! It’s cute.
Guy: It’s a girl squirrel.
Girl: How do you know?
Guy: It has squirrel tits. [Girl hits him over the head.]
Newark, Delaware
Dude #1: So then I was like, “take that back, you bitch!”
Dude #2: Whoa man, then what happened?
Dude #1: She bent over, and then it hit her that I wasn't trying to bone her doggy style. I dumped her two minutes later.
Dude #2: Haha, yeah! That's my sister for you!
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Stephanie C.
Brunette: And then he called me back ten minutes later and told me his brother got his girlfriend pregnant, and she's like sixteen or something.
Blonde: Is he mad his brother and his girlfriend hooked up?
Brunette: He's got more serious issues dating a child and shit.
Kent State University
Kent, Ohio
