San Francisco

Booth babe: So, you spent your day answering questions about free software, and you’re going to spend your night answering questions about — what — genital warts?

LinuxWorld Expo
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Just don’t confuse the two

Hippie chick on cell: … So then I realized that’s just how she is and I need to honor that.
Guy passerby: Just get it over with and call her a bitch already!

San Francisco, California

Overheard by: melissa

Tween boy: Can you imagine what it would be like to spend the night here? All the unfriendly spirits…
Teen girl, horrified: And, bugs!

Alcatraz Island
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Casper the Friendly Roach

Mom with sunscreen in hand: Give me your arm so I can put this on you.
Little boy: Ewww! What is that?
Mom: Sunscreen. What did you think it was?
Little boy: Mayonnaise!

Giants Game, AT&T Park
San Francisco, California

Old grump #1: Well, you know how women boast.
Old grump #2: I know that. But I still cannot take her word for it that she is the best lay in the city.

Bloomingdale’s
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: the real deal

Teen girl to friend: Did you really think it was a coincidence that the week after you started bathing regularly you lost your virginity?

The Urban School
San Francisco, California

Bar patron: I might talk about it if I had a few drinks in me… But I’d never let someone do it!

Hawaii Bar
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: McNasty

Student: I decided to be a speech communication major because I like to talk a lot, and I wanted to find a way where I could get a job that makes me a lot of money for using my mouth.

San Francisco State University
California

Mother, reading newspaper: Dear God, another rapist is loose…
Six-year-old daughter: Mom, what’s rape?
Mother, uncomfortably: Um, that’s when a man forces a woman to have sex with him.
Six-year-old daughter: What’s sex?
Mother: Look! A bird!

Market Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Queen Of Spades

Enthusiastic lady: Oh, you must be having a boy!
Very preggers: Uh, no… It’s actually a girl.
Enthusiastic lady: Really? Because your face has changed!
Very preggers: What do you mean?
Enthusiastic lady: Oh, you know, it just looks bad. I was ugly, too, when I was pregnant with my son.

Clinic waiting room
San Francisco, California