Sit-ups guy to older dude: Oh, hey there, Bob.
Older dude: You know, every time I see you I think of my dog.
Sit-ups guy: Oh? Why's that?
Older dude: I keep trying to get him to kneel. (walks away)
Z-Center, MIT
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: MaybeHisNameIsNeal
Boy: I believe in waiting until marriage.
Girl: That’s funny, cause I believe in you fucking my brains out.
Bryn Mawr College
Pennsylvania
College girl #1: Did you hear about that slavery thing?
College girl #2: No, like a real, live slavery thing?
College girl #1: Yeah! It's in Europe somewhere, like the Philippines.
Rock Valley College
Illinois
Guy leaving psych class: Why are we talking about bed bugs liking it up the ass?! How is that relevant?
University of Pittsburgh
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Ellie
Girl to friend: I distinctly remember him saying “I still have the dildo up my ass.”
UCLA
Los Angeles, California
Jock: Dude, I went to our professor's office yesterday, and you know what? She has a giant bottle of lube just sitting there on her desk!
(pause)
Friend: You jackass! That's hand sanitizer on her desk, not lube!
University of Colorado
Overheard by: I keep the lube in the drawer
Girl #1: Well, it doesn't bother me.
Girl #2: That's because you don't have to look at it!
Girl #3: You. Look. Like. A. Whore.
Girl #4: But a mermaid whore!
University of Florida
Guy on cell: Have you ever heard “Dreidel, dreidel ” played on guitar? It's fucking awesome!
University of Delaware
Newark, Delaware
Bro #1: Dude, now that you're here…
Bro #2: We can start making some fucking memories!
Michigan State University
Freshman, loudly walking through dorm lobby: It wasn't an STD! …just, like, a germ-filled cesspool…
CSU
Fort Collins, Colorado
