Stoner #1: Do you have telekinesis?
Stoner #2: No, but I got call-waiting and that three-way call thing.

Escondido, California

Overheard by: DLo

Overeager mother: Sometimes when my boobies sweat, they smell like Big Macs.

Madison, Indiana

Enthusiastic elderly Southern woman: There was BBs flying all through the winders, I was so upset I cried. I wasn't going to church at that time, but I went to Wal-Mart.

Richmond, Kentucky

Overheard by: Akilah

Teenage girl to another: So you can do it! You are going to go there, have sex with him, and I am going to tickle it out of you!

Nashville, Tennessee

Teen girl to friend: You know what I wanna do? Smoke a joint rolled in a page from the bible.


Overheard by: Dylan

Teenage scene girl: I'm going to American Apparel to apply for a job.
Friend: Do you think you'll get the job?
Teenage scene girl: Yeah, but I don't think my mom will let me.
Friend: Why?
Teenage scene girl: There are lesbians there.

Manhattan, New York

Mom to child: We are not buying food for imaginary people.

McDonald’s, Redcliffe

Overheard by: Ashley

Five-year-old daughter: Daddy, ask me some math questions.
Father: Okay, what is 4 x 4?
Five-year-old daughter: It's not 9!
Father: That's correct.

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Michael Moore

Teen boy #1: He's gay.
Teen boy #2: No, he isn't.
Teen girl: He's just orange!
Teen boy #2, laughing: “Orange” isn't a sexual orientation.
Teen boy #1, laughing so hard he's crying: I was just thinking that.
Teen boy #2: Hes like, an Oompa-Loompa. He's always so mean 'cause he's tall, they rejected him because he was different.

New York City, New York

Crazy hobo in McDonald’s line: Does the McDuplo come with fries?
Mcworker: Only if you get the combo. Would you like the combo?
Crazy hobo in McDonald’s line: Son of a bitch! This is McDonald’s. I want fries with my fucking sandwich. [he throws up on the floor, then walks away muttering.]Mcworker to other mcworker: I wish I was dead.

Belo Horizonte