Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad, changing his diaper: I hear ya.
Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad: Uh huh.
Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad: I told you not to mess with those guys.
(tourist baby laughs)
Tourist dad: Yeah, you know what I'm talking about!
Restroom, Walt Disney World
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: The Normie in the Handistall
Toddler in cart: Look, Daddy — wine!
Dad: Yes, that’s the wine section.
Toddler in cart: Mommy always buys lots of wine!
Dad: Yes. Yes, she does…
Wine department, Quality Food Center
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: anniebanannie
Little boy being pushed in cart: You smell!
Dad: No, you smell!
Little boy: No, you smell!
Dad: You smell!
(a little later)
Little boy: That was awful!
Dad: Only because you think it is.
Little boy: You're a sock!
Dad: Oh, I'm a sock now?
Little boy: A soooock!
Dad: No, you're a sock!
Whole Foods
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: Kafrin
Father holding infant son in glass elevator: Are you scared, sweetie? It must be nice not to have a sense of your own mortality.
Burlington Mall
Burlington, Massachusetts
Toddler: Do you want a piece of me? Do you want a piece of me?
Father: Are you talking to me?
Toddler: Do you want a piece of me?
Father: No, that’s okay.
Chicago, Illinois
Young boy: Dad, what does this say?
Father: What do you think it says? It says, ‘Irish.’
Young boy: What’s that?
Father: Irish are little, short people.
Thousand Oaks, California
Father: Honey, you can’t cry on the train. The conductor will kick us off.
Young daughter, crying: Can I cry on the bus?
Father, after thoughtful pause: Sure, you can cry on the bus.
MBTA Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Joe
Four-year-old girl: Daddy, can you hold my hand?
Disheveled father: I am not your personal hand holder!
Wal-Mart parking lot
Warminster, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Catty
