Death & dying

Girl #1: So last week, I went to find my cat…and I found her dead on the side of the porch.
Girl #2: (unphased)
Girl #1: And then, I went into the backyard to feed my dog…and I found him dead on the side of the house!
Girl #2: (starts laughing uncontrollably)

Escondido
San Diego, Calfornia

Overheard by: see-are-uh

Completely calm girl: We're all gonna die.
Happy girl, laughing: It's true!

Eugene, Oregon

Teen girl #1: Are you going to see that movie about Kurt Cobain? The actor that plays him is supposed to be good!
Teen girl #2: Why would they make a movie about him if someone else was playing him? Can't they just wait until he dies and then make one?
Teen girl #1: He is dead.

Los Angeles, California

Ranting professor: Say you're on a date, and your waiter places a bag of saltine crackers in front of you.
(students are puzzled)
Ranting professor: So, you're happy to have these crackers. But your date says to you: “Don't you see the filet mignon or the lobster?” But you can't see them! So you eat the crackers, and then you die. Then I go to your funeral.

Moorpark College
Moorpark, California

Overheard by: Amanduh

Woman to friends holding books: I finally told him, “I don't care if your father dies tonight–I am not missing book club!”

Coffee Shop
Kenosha, Wisconsin

Overheard by: a coffee gal

Goth/punk chick smoking a cigarette: Oh shit, you know what I forgot?
Goth/punk guy: That you're killing your unborn baby?

Huron & First
Ann Arbor, Michigan

Overheard by: Melanie

Soccer mom #1: I heard once that the reason animals don't live as long as humans is because they come into the world knowing how to love, and we have to learn.
Soccer mom #2: That is so true.

Lee County Humane Society
Auburn, Alabama

Overheard by: Gee

Guy #1: You want to come hang out at my grandparents' with me?
Guy #2: That's alright. I don't like hanging out with grandparents. They're always dying and shit.

Gastown
Vancouver
Canadia

Aboriginal hobo: There is a nice cave outside of Kings Park. Only problem is there's some old guy livin' in it, he's been livin' there for at least 20 years… I'm just waiting for him to die already so I can move in.

Train
Perth
Australia

Overheard by: Dylann

Guy on phone with friend: Yeah, but I think Tommy's grandparents died, so his house might be on for the party if his parents are out of town.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: 8 Day Charm