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Do They Count If You Have to Blow Them Up?

Music history professor: Darwin says that the sole purpose for living things is to survive and procreate. What about us, as musicians? Do we need music to survive and procreate? Well, some people believe that music was created as a sort of mating call. Compare the reproductive life of Jimi Hendrix to the reproductive life of… well, me.
Class: Um…
Music history professor: Well, clearly I win hands-down because of all my groupies.

1 East Mount Vernon Place
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: stravinsky

Your Editors Are Already Imagining Their New Website

Girl #1, about girl #2's umbrella: That's so skinny!
Girl #2: Yeah, thanks.
Girl #1: You could do bad things with that…

Binghamton University, New York

Overheard by: Jillian

Actually, Crutchy Was the Only Crippled Newsie

Girl on cell: Wait! (pause) So, it's a gang for crippled people?

Orlando, Florida

Winston Churchill Pushes the Allies to Invade Sicily

Guy on cell: I believe in signs, dude. I took a dump and it was totally shaped like a boot. I'm going to Italy.

http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2008/07/guy-discussing-his-vacation-plans.html

Overheard by: alicia

Andie McDowell's Character in Four Weddings and a Funeral Was Kind Of a Bitch

Girl #1: After he proposed, I thought to myself, “why couldn't he have done this a few days before, so I could show off my ring at the funeral?”
Girl #2: I know, that's such a shame!

University of Delaware

Overheard by: It wasn't even THAT pretty of a ring!

We Blame This Sort Of Thing on the Food Network

Large biker to another: Ooooh, puree!

Walmart's Pasta Sauce Section
Little Rock, Arkansas

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We’re Hoping She’ll Grow Out of That Once She Turns Five

Middle-aged professor, matter-of-factly: My daughter loves Stephen Colbert. She calls him her ‘baby daddy.’

Art League School
Alexandria, Virginia

Who's Going As Pontius Pilate of Nottingham?

Bimbette, looking at halloween costumes online with her boyfriend: Oh, look! You can go as Robin Hood and I'll be Mary Magdalene!

RIC College
Providence, Rhode Island

Have You Considered an Air Purifier?

Geology professor, after sneezing: It's all these trees outside having all of this unprotected sex.
Student: We're just caught in the crossfire.
Geology professor: Exactly. You should see the stains on my car!

University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia

We'll Never Understand Hippie Porn

Hipster to another: It's so funny because the yurt is so small!

Ithaca, New York

Overheard by: Cree

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