So You'd Just Have to Be Careful About Static Shock

Pretty girl: So, do you like anyone right now?
Serious guy: Eva Mendes, but she lives far away.
Pretty girl: She's hairy.
Serious guy: Yeah, I kinda noticed that.
Pretty girl (in acknowledgment): Yeah.
Serious guy (in agreement): Yeah.

El Paso, Texas

Posted on July 11, 2015
About celebrities, Default, Girls, Guys, Hair, Questions, Texas

Where the Strippers Shit in the Water

Guy #1: So yeah, you can get in the water with them but you can’t touch the manatees unless they swim up to you.
Guy #2: Sort of like a strip club.

Bar
Kansas City, Missouri

Overheard by: Matt

Posted on July 11, 2015
Advice, Animals, Bars & Clubs, Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Missouri, Sexuality

What Else Does One Do with a Degree in Theology?

Guy: It’s a pity there isn’t a commercial nuclear submarine sector, or I would do that.

Oxford
UK

Posted on July 11, 2015
Default, Gripes, Guys, UK, Weirdness

Charleton Heston Was Quickly Reincarnated

Three-year-old boy (enthusiastically): When I get home, I’m going to shoot someone!
Sunday school teacher: I don’t think you should do that.
Three-year-old boy: With a squirt gun!
Sunday school teacher: Oh, good.
Three-year-old boy: And a machine gun!

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/304115855/some-problems-require-a-machine-gun.html

Overheard by: wayzata

Posted on July 11, 2015
Crimes, Death & dying, Default, Education, Kids, Murder, Overheard in Minneapolis, Teachers

Especially with This Little Pink Bow

Three-year-old boy to grandfather: Do you have a penis?
Grandfather: Yes, I do.
Boy: I have a penis, too. My penis is small. My penis is cute.

Cincinnati, Ohio

Overheard by: Vejewsbian

Posted on July 11, 2015
Compliments, Dads, Default, Gender issues, Guys, Kids, Ohio, Penis, Pride, Questions

Hell Begins When the Buzz Wears Off

Teen guy to teen girls: Starbucks is like heaven! Everyone at Starbucks is happy and nice to each other, because they're drinking coffee, and that makes people happy!

Starbucks, Southern Cross Station
Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: XPIOTOS

Posted on July 11, 2015
Australia, Compliments, Default, Feelings, Food, Friends, Guys, Restaurants, Teens

…How's That for a Birthday Card?

Tough guy who waxes his eyebrows: Yeah, my old girlfriend was smart. She didn't let me take any pictures or videotape her while we were fucking. This new chick…if she's ever famous, I'm rich!

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Posted on July 11, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Money, Pennsylvania, Relationships, Sexuality, Weirdness

She's Such a Little Planner

Middle-aged woman: Yep, that's my daughter. She wants our oldest cat to die so that it can be skinned and stuffed.

Portland, Oregon

Posted on July 11, 2015
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If Only There Were a Word for That…

Teenage girl: I can't figure out if he's gay or straight. Maybe he's, like, an equal-opportunity kind of guy?
20-something girl: Oh yeah, like, “Bring me your penises! Bring me your vaginas! None shall be turned away!”

Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Posted on July 11, 2015
Default, Girls, Louisiana, Penis, Questions, Sexuality, Teens, Vagina

It's Best for Everyone That Vegans Stop Eating

Hipster girl: I was wondering, is this really vegan?
Trader joe's worker: Depends, how vegan are you?
Hipster girl: I take that as a no cause I'm super vegan.
Trader joe's worker: It has sugar and calcium chloride.
Hipster girl: [slams box on counter and walks away].

Trader Joe's in Hollywood

Overheard by: deciphur

Posted on July 10, 2015
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