Short girl: So, what do you do with the pen cap condoms?
Much taller girl: Okay, you take them…and you throw them out.
Short girl: You don't like…reuse them or something?
Much taller girl, smiling: Do you reuse normal condoms?
(short girl laughs)
Much taller girl, seriously: Don't just wash those and reuse them.
Onteora HS
Boiceville, New York
Overheard by: Toasted
College freshman: I keep making plans for my funeral, and they keep getting better!
San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Anne
Chick: So like three weeks ago, after I gave birth, we went to this club…
Cambridge, Massachusetts
blond girl talking to redhead – "I will introduce you to him. He is really into gingers and half of his face is eaten away."
Golden Gate Park, San Francisco
Overheard by: Murphy
White construction worker yelling into house under construction: Hey Miguel, what are you listening to in there?
Miguel, yelling back: Bach's Goldberg Variations.
White construction worker, muttering: Crazy Mexican drywallers.
Longmont, Colorado
Overheard by: Landscaper
White, middle aged music professor: I don’t do sevenths. Homie don’t play that.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Girl to friends, emphatically: No, we have nipples so that we can milk our children!
Newton, Massachusetts
Six-year-old #1: I'm taking you to court!
Six-year-old #2: No you're not!
Six-year-old #1: I'm taking you to court!
Six-year-old #2: No you're not!
Six-year-old #1: You're in court!
Six-year-old #2: No I'm not!
Six-year-old #1: You're in court now!
Six-year-old #2: (begins to cry)
Small Town
Maine
Overheard by: Willem Rosenthal
Irishman to friend, huddling under bar's awning during massive downpour: And people wonder why we drink…
Dublin
Ireland
Overheard by: l_tau
Guy: Where'd you go for lunch today?
Friend: Umm…I don't want to tell you.
Guy: Oh god, you went to Arby's, didn't you!
Friend, groaning: Yes.
Bar
Omaha, Nebraska
