Child eating skeleton fruit snacks: Mommy, look! I'm eating a boner!

Disney World

Guy: If I bought a handgun I would name it “Lady Boner.”

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Claire

Professor: Here's a good thing to compare to the turgor pressure in a plant cell: have any of you seen an erection?

University of Illinois at Chicago

Overheard by: suddenly paying attention

20-something woman to friends: He was putting sunscreen on his dick and got a boner!

Plutos Restaurant
Palo Alto, California

Professor to class (during tasting session): Anybody getting any wood on this one?

Wine Appreciation 101
University of Houston, Texas

Male student: I just… can't control my erections.

Library, University of Washington
Seattle, Washington

Girl #1: Isn’t lap dancing anal sex?
Girl #2: Uhh, excuse me?
Girl #1: Well, if a girl sits on a guy’s lap and he gets an erection, it would go [points up] up the ass, right?

High School

Overheard by: NinjaPirates

Woman: Wood is like money to old people.

Maryland Farms
Brentwood, Tennessee

Overheard by: FACT.

Discouraged guy to pal: I can’t stop having erections!

St-Jean Street
Old Quebec City

Overheard by: My mom u-turned on the sidewalk and started running after him!