Overly chatty middle-aged guy on date: Doctors love giving women a hysterectomy. They will find any reason to give a woman a hysterectomy. Like, we're already up there, might as well scoop it on out now.
Italian Restaurant
Highland, California
Overheard by: well,,,there goes my appetite.
30-something #1: Last night I was brushing my hair, cause you know I haven't owned a hair brush in a year… And all these sticks and grass and dirt kept falling out.
30-something #2: You are a dirty hippie, you need to use some soap!
30-something #1: I don't like labels, man. I don't have soap.
30-something #2: True, man, labels are whack. But dude, you smell.
Hostel
New Mexico
Overheard by: Alex
Lady in suit to man in wheelchair: Well, you're quick on your feet, I'll give you that. You're quick on your feet… Oh.
Summer Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Julianna
20-something girl: My ass hurts and my throat is sore. I also feel very underwhelmed.
San Francisco, California
Pilot #1: He flew to Myrtle Beach to meet some girl he met online. We were expecting to find him naked in a bathtub full of ice missing a kidney.
Flight attendant: Who would want his kidney? He's so short!
Pilot #2: Hey, kids need kidneys too! Little kids!
Atlanta, Georgia
Chipper girl: I tell the sex workers that they can wear the female condom before going out. You can wear it for, like, three hours. They are kind of loud, though — they crinkle! Sex is awkward, anyway.
Women’s health class, American University
Washington, DC
Overheard by: aimc
Girl #1: Did you finish your French project?
Girl #2: Yeah.
Girl #1: Did you puke on it?
Girl #2: No, not this time.
Laguna Hills, California
Girl #1: My two biggest concerns in life are rowing and gays.
Girl #2: Rowing and what?
Girl #1: Gays!
George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia
Girl: Well, the sad thing is I'm gonna have to treat you like Morgan when she doesn't want to take her ear infection pills.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
20-something girl to another: I love hairy West Coast men. If they look like they haven't showered or shaved in a good week, send 'em my way.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
