Professor: One day you’ll wake up an old weathered hag, unless you’re Cher–she’ll just turn to dust one day when the sun hits her.
McDaniel College
Maryland
Professor: One day you’ll wake up an old weathered hag, unless you’re Cher–she’ll just turn to dust one day when the sun hits her.
McDaniel College
Maryland
Kid: Mommy, if I were invisible, would I be Daddy’s imaginary friend or yours?
Flynn & O’Hara’s
Rockville, Maryland
Old man to another, looking at soup: I just feel like I'm getting ripped off by the French!
Grocery Store
Maryland
Overheard by: Nic
Brunette girl: So like, if I had a mustache, would you tell me?
Tall blonde friend: Of course, would you tell me?
Brunette: Totally.
Tall blonde: I totally have a mustache?!
Brunette: No, no, no…I would totally tell you if you did, but you don't!
Tall blonde: Oh, okay.
(several seconds pass, they sip drinks)
Tall blonde: So we're having topless sleepover at my place tonight, right?
Red Maple
Baltimore, Maryland
Professor: Now, I want you to listen to what McCormack does with this last phrase. And then I want you to go slit your wrists. Because I know I do every time I hear this.
Peabody Conservatory
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Emo has nothing on opera
Angry mother: Don’t do that! [Son screams.] I have friends, you know! You think I would rather be with you than with them?! I have a life!
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: K-lee
Girl #1: So what do you think of her boyfriend?
Girl #2: I can see his underwear through his pants.
Tapas Teatro
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Underwear Moderator
Student teacher: All right, guys, let's try that again. But this time with 30 to 40% less child death.
Clarksville, Maryland
Mom, doing mock interview of five-year-old for their journal: Okay, who is your least favorite person?
Five-year-old: Saddam Hussein, and the girl at school with the bent chin.
Maryland
Overheard by: Brittany
