I'm Not Even Gonna Ask About Your Leash Collection

Grandmother: So my friend gave me dog biscuits for my birthday.
Teen girl: But you don't have a dog.
Grandmother: She knew I would appreciate them, dear.
Teen girl: And it isn't your birthday.
Grandmother: That doesn't matter. I was going to save them for the Boxer that young man brings around the home, but I got hungry around noon.
Teen girl: Oh no. You didn't.
Grandmother: What? It's not as if I ate them plain. I boiled a cup of coffee and dipped them.

Frammingham, Massachusetts

Posted on October 2, 2018
Animals, Family, Food, Gifts, Massachusetts, Old folks, Teens, Weirdness

One Of the Perks of Hiring Jesus As a Bartender

Guy on cell: I'll buy you an infinite beer!

UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts

Posted on September 29, 2018
Colleges & Universities, Default, Drinking & drunks, Guys, Massachusetts, Offers and requests, On the phone

Well, We’ve Revised the Script and Now It’s Hamsters

Girl: You know — that thing where you have a fetish for albinos…?

Emerson College
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Hannah

Posted on September 26, 2018
Kink, Massachusetts, Students

College Applications Get More Personal Every Year

Middle schooler to friend: So, have you ever had anal sex with your mom?

Brighton, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Holly

Posted on September 22, 2018
Backdoor, Default, Family ties, Massachusetts, Questions, Students

But I've Thought About That, Too

Girl: Cara is so cute.
Guy: Yeah, she's adorable.
Girl: I mean, if I were a lesbian, I'd have sex with her.
Guy: I'm a little creeped out by that.
Girl: I mean, I've thought about it… (slight pause) I've never weighed myself!

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on July 31, 2018
Beauty, Bi-curious, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Default, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Massachusetts, Sexuality, Weirdness

Xanax?

Young female yuppie to friend: You really might have to calm me down. I haven't been in a mall in a long time.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: samantha

Posted on July 16, 2018
Advice, Default, Feelings, Girls, Massachusetts, Offers and requests, Yuppies

We Know, Eminem.

30-something guy: I can't speak English, but my prose is fuckin' smooth.

Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: hb

Posted on July 14, 2018
Compare and contrast, Guys, Language barrier, Massachusetts

We Should Put the Top Up in the Boxster, Though

(it is raining extremely hard outside)
Gay guy #1: So wet. Whatever, I guess we can make this look work.
Gay guy #2: We totally can.

Outside Macy's
Burlington, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Emma W.

Posted on July 8, 2018
Clothes, Compare and contrast, Default, Fashion, Massachusetts, Queers, Stores, Weather

We Imagine Futurama‘s Professor Farnsworth in This Role

Student: Hi professor, we need some help with our regressions.
Professor, cutting her off: Enough about you. I got a new dog yesterday, look I have a picture!
Student: Uhh… He’s cute?

Wellesley, Massachusetts

Posted on May 31, 2018
Animals, Default, Education, Etiquette, Massachusetts, Students, Teachers

Not Exactly…

BU student #1, looking at his CharlieCard: Dude, I have never seen this guy anywhere in Boston. Where do you think he is?
BU student #2, also looking at his CharlieCard: Dude, I don't know.
BU student #1: Maybe he died.
BU student #3: Yeah, because he was sticking his fucking head out of the fucking train window while the train was in motion.

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on May 12, 2018
Death & dying, Guys, Massachusetts, Public transportation, Violence