Little old lady: Are you here to poop? That’s what I just did. Everybody poops. It feels great! Such a relief!
Preschool girl: Yeah!
Girl’s mom: Come on, honey… What have I told you about talking to crazy strangers?
Bathroom, Target
Novi, Michigan
Little old lady: Are you here to poop? That’s what I just did. Everybody poops. It feels great! Such a relief!
Preschool girl: Yeah!
Girl’s mom: Come on, honey… What have I told you about talking to crazy strangers?
Bathroom, Target
Novi, Michigan
Girl, to barking dog: Don't talk to me like you know me!
Wyoming, Michigan
Overheard by: Roxie
Professor: In the work-a-day world we work a lot through our mouth.
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Guy with baby: So, I found out that Ed tried something fairly kinky with Sarah when they got together at our wedding…
Girl: What? What did he try?
Guy with baby: It was fairly kinky…
Girl: Did he try to sodomize her?
Guy with baby: Alright, he did! But he was too drunk… She said it was like a marshmallow. [Turns to baby in baby talk] Wasn’t my cousin a big silly to try to sodomize my roommate when he was in that state? Yes he was! Yes he was!
Dominick’s Restaurant
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: Jack
Sorority girl #1: That whore stole my coach bag!
Sorority girl #2: Did you call her out on it?
Sorority girl #1: Well, no, it wasn't actually mine yet, but I told her that I was going to get that one like a week ago, and now she's carrying it. (walks past coach girl, who has iPod headphones in one ear, phone up to other ear) Whore!
Central Michigan University
Overheard by: Central Girl
Pregnant black lady on cell buying 24-pack of beer at self-checkout: Girl, next time I have me a baby daddy I’ma get me a credit report!
Southfield, Michigan
Thug: Damn, mami — look at them curves on you!
Ethnic chick: Sorry, boys, I have an arranged marriage. I’m kind of tied down to my fiancé [shows ring].
Thug: Come on, mami, let us sit down.
Blonde sorority girl #1: Sorry, gentlemen, we’re just trying to eat our food here. God bless. [Thugs look at her awkwardly and walk away.]Blonde sorority girl #2, very confused: Why did you just say ‘God bless’ to them?
Blonde sorority girl #1: What? It’s what you say to homeless people.
Leo’s Coney Island
Birmingham, Michigan
Overheard by: Jamie
Woman at counter: [Mumbling.]Clerk: No, we don’t carry weapons here.
Hallmark Store
St. Joseph, Michigan
Overheard by: but if you try the precious moments store…
Professor: This assignment is worth 20 points, but doing it can only earn you up to 18. The only way to get the last two points is to dress up.
Exasperated student: As what?!
Eastern Michigan University
Hobo to passerby wearing sunglasses: That’s right, ’cause I’m radioactive!
Detroit, Michigan
