Fat lady #1: You can not wear that.
Fat lady #2: Shut up. I’m gonna suck it in!
Old Navy, Palisades Center Mall
Nyack, New York
Overheard by: Please Don’t
Fat lady #1: You can not wear that.
Fat lady #2: Shut up. I’m gonna suck it in!
Old Navy, Palisades Center Mall
Nyack, New York
Overheard by: Please Don’t
Bicyclist: So I guess your grandma didn't like the joke about your balls.
Rockland County, New York
Drunk girl #1: Hey, Ken! How huge was that vagina I drew?
Ken: Yeah, it was pretty big.
Drunk girl #2: It was classy, though.
Kransky’s Bar
St. James, New York
Overheard by: Gette
Fast-walking woman: You know him — Scott…
Fast-walking man: Was that the guy who put your mother to sleep?
Glens Falls, New York
Overheard by: Kate E. Austin
Guy: So Stacy comes in and finds me screaming in the shower.
Friend: Wow!
Guy: Yeah, there are some places you should just never touch after cutting Habanero peppers.
Men's Room
Garrison, New York
Overheard by: mark
Kid #1: Yo, man! You're missin' somethin'.”
Kid #2: What?
Kid #1: Yeah, you look weird now that you got a haircut.
Kid #2: Huh?
Kid #1: You need to get some earrings!
SUNY
Old Westbury, New York
Busy-looking female suit on cell: Face it, Carol, you just didn't marry well.
Upstate New York
Thug #1: New England is a state!
Thug #2: New England is a country!
Thug #1: Naw, it’s a state. You know — New York, New Jersey, New England!
Thug #3: You both crazy. New England is a city! It got an NFL team — the New England Patriots!
Thug #1: Naw, man, they sometimes be namin’ teams after states, like Minnesota Vikings and Seattle Seahawks…
Thug #3: Hmmm… You right. Oh! Maybe New England be both a city and a state, like New York, New York! New England, New England!
Thug #1: That gotta be it. I knows New England is a state…
Mall pizza place
Buffalo, New York
Overheard by: Snoopy
Homeless man approaching peach stand: Peaches, what’s they job? [Silence from passersby.] They job, what’s they job?
Befuddled white preppy #1: Well, I think they have potassium…
Homeless man: But what’s they job?
Befuddled white preppy #2: The color probably means they have beta carotene…
Homeless man: Peaches, what’s they job?
Farmer’s market, Union Square
New York, New York
Overheard by: I don’t know, either
Drunken wedding guest to videographer going from table to table: Zach*, I want to wish you and Jenny* many years of happiness, and I hope you get as much pleasure out of fucking her as I did.
Other guests at table: Erase that! Erase that!
Videographer: Are you kidding? This is like gold!
Roslyn Jewish Center
Roslyn Heights, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
