Assholes

Large white lady to small Mexican husband: I’m bleeding. [Pokes hubby, who ignores her.] Heyyy, I’m bleeding from my neck! Don’t you care?! [Hubby puts headphones on and looks out window.] I wish I knew you didn’t speak English before I married you!

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/06/perfect-couple.html

Overheard by: corwin

Bro #1: You were about to make fun of a girl who was missing a hand!
Bro #2 (defensively): An arm!

Rogue Valley Mall
Medford, Oregon

Girl (about her college): The on-campus security is really good too, the campus police will get to you in like, 30 seconds. I’m still thinking about getting mace or something.
Girl’s younger brother: No one wants to rape you.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Quazarfreez

Girl, to guy who just got off a ski lift: Joe? Is that you? It's Mary. We used to date!
Guy: Oh, yeah, I thought you looked familiar from behind.

Ski Resort
Tahoe, Nevada

Red-headed woman: I wish they’d take this place and just plunk it down in New York so I could shove people.
Red-headed guy: Word!

National Museum of Natural History
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Nujju

Guy to friends: In his backyard were six tortured dogs. (pause) And those dogs were us!

York University
Canadia

Overheard by: that guys cat

Gay guy to hobo: Good morning. Did you get a hair cut?
Hobo: (mutters about spare change)
Gay guy: I know you got a hair cut! See, if you would have said hi to me, maybe I would have given you a dollar or something! (starts walking down street) Why do people have to be so ignorant on such a sunny day?

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Meater Maid

Amnesty International worker: Do you guys have a minute to help end violence against women?
Dude #1: I'm Cambridge's one registered Republican. Do you have a minute to talk about the things I don't have a minute for?
Dude #2: Burn!

Harvard Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts

New Yorker, trying to get through a crowd of people blocking aisle: Excuse me. Excuse me! Excuse me!
Confused little boy: I already moved.
New Yorker: Oh, I know you have, dear. I was talking to your fat-ass mother.

Grocery Store
Austin, Texas

Reporter to bodyguard for racist, fascist political party holding a press conference: Can you tell us why we're not being allowed to enter?
Bodyguard: You've printed repeated and insidious lies about our party.
Reporter, after long pause: We're a tv station.

Manchester
England