Drunk 20-something girl with iPhone to friends: Hey, have a look at my photos of me getting done up the arse last night!
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Gentleman: See, this is the thing — I have a couple of drinks, and then I think, ‘Hmmm… Spiro’s cock up my arse…’
http://community.livejournal.com/overheardinmelb/243261.html
Straight guy: I really need your advice about this girl.
Gay guy: Stick it in her butt!
Straight guy: No. Her mom set us up on this date…
Gay guy: Stick it in her butt!
Straight guy: You just suggested that. I mean, I like her but I definitely don’t want to date her, and we’re supposed to hang out this weekend, but I don’t know what to do with her.
Gay guy: Well, just be like: “Hey, do you want to toss a Frisbee in the arboretum?”
Straight guy: And if she says yes, be like: “Okay, do you want to toss my salad in the arboretum?”
Gay guy: Awesome.
Lancaster, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: $kank
Boyfriend: Let’s get you all liquored up, and I can throw it in your butt.
Girlfriend: No! That’s not even how it happened the first time.
Trader Joe’s
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Jummy Bear
Girl #1: It is so hard getting laid living with my brother. I am a fucking loud girl when it's going on. For me to be quiet has been hard as hell.
Girl #2: Maybe get him to gag you, you'll like it and you will be quiet, that is what I found myself getting into.
Girl #1: I don't know, maybe I will try it, but I can't be doing that with a guy I meet on the first night.
Girl #3: It would be like anything else: try it a few times, if you don't like it find something else.
Girl #1: Last time I did that I tried anal, and that did not end well.
Girls #2 and #3: (laugh hard)
Girl #2: I remember that disaster.
Bar
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Queer to date: Do you have a fist up your ass?
Center City, Philadelphia
Overheard by: keeeeem
Guy with baby: So, I found out that Ed tried something fairly kinky with Sarah when they got together at our wedding…
Girl: What? What did he try?
Guy with baby: It was fairly kinky…
Girl: Did he try to sodomize her?
Guy with baby: Alright, he did! But he was too drunk… She said it was like a marshmallow. [Turns to baby in baby talk] Wasn’t my cousin a big silly to try to sodomize my roommate when he was in that state? Yes he was! Yes he was!
Dominick’s Restaurant
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: Jack
Girl to two guys: So, who has the smaller cock?
Guy #1: Oh, me.
Girl: You can fuck me in the ass.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Doug
