Colleges & Universities

Sad girl: So we broke up and I started crying, and I told him to leave and he was like “can we still watch Star Wars?”
Short haired girl: It's not even that good a movie!

Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Amused

Student in library: Could you forget that Jesus died for your sins for like five minutes?

Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts

Young gay guy #1: Dude! You were like so throwing yourself at him. What happened?
Young gay guy #2: I think he's a lesbian.

College of Western Idaho

Overheard by: Another lesbian traped in a mans body

Women studies professor, during discussion about nymphomaniacs: Ladies, are there any of you who are in a constant state of arousal?
Class: (uncomfortable silence)
Professor: Let me rephrase that. Are you constantly ready to engage in sex?
Student, alarmed: Professor, I don't think any of us are comfortable with answering this question.

Saint Peter's College
Jersey City, New Jersey

Girl: So I hear that all Puerto Rican women are like models.
Guy: What?
Girl: Like they're all really hot and stuff.
Guy: I'm sure some are…
Girl: Yeah, they are, and they wear like thongs and stuff for underwear too.
Guy: I always heard Puerto Rican women were fat.
Girl: No, that's Hawaiian women.
Guy: Oh.

Lecture Hall
University of Alabama at Birmingham

Composition professor: So, by the way, this is how your do the top of the paper–title, dash, name, just like this paper here. I don't want a four-page paper which is three and a half pages long, with a half-page heading.
Student: But it's standard MLA citation practice for that heading to be like that.
Professor: Fuck MLA.

Hofstra University
Long Island, New York

Overheard by: I hate MLA

Boyfriend to girlfriend: If anyone ever walked in on us having sex, they'd swear we hate each other.

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

Girl #1: You shouldn't drink that. It's bad for the baby.
Girl #2, drinking wine: It better be.

Washington and Lee University
Lexington, Virginia

Overheard by: Eden

Girl to friend: And then they nailed Him to a cross! And we get chocolate eggs for this?

College Campus
Michigan

Girl #1: So what's up with those boots you bought this weekend? You don't look like the type to wear them.
Girl #2: Uh, Tim* wanted me to buy them.
Girl #1: Oh, that's right. I almost forgot about his boot fetish.
Girl #2: And I'm pretty sure he wants me to wear them. And nothing else.
Girl #1, sighing wistfully: I wish I had a hot relationship like that! All I have is slut sex!

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey