Dude on phone: You have a post-coital gift shop?!
College Campus
Denver, Colorado
Dude on phone: You have a post-coital gift shop?!
College Campus
Denver, Colorado
Man: Chicago is not one of the 49 states.
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: Vanessa
Two-year-old: Mommy!
Tired teen girl: I'm not your mommy.
Two-year-old: Daddy?
Preschool
Denver, Colorado
Student: How can you tell that it's “the walls have ears” and not “the ears have walls”? I mean, I guess that would make sense if you were drugged up…
Professor: Are you implying that I'm not drugged up?
Latin Class
Denver, Colorado
Chick, seriously: Corn's one of them slow motherfuckers.
Friend, upset: Whores.
Aurora, Colorado
Overheard by: Leevee
Freshman boy: I don't think Helen Keller was too concerned about dick.
High School
Colorado
Overheard by: clur
Teen girl: My brother got released from the loony bin today. Same day as he got a new roommate, who kills animals and has an extra Y chromosome. I'm like, “Goddamn!”
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Female student: I came home last night and found my roommate sitting on the kitchen floor, crying and holding a bottle of Jägermeister and a recipe for homemade enchiladas.
Dumb friend: I didn't know you made enchiladas with Jägermeister.
University of Colorado, Boulder
Chick #1: She's on a date with a French guy.
(pause)
Chick #2: I bet French cock is like an eclair.
University of Denver, Colorado
