(in a philosophy class, the subject of “lovemaking vs. fucking” is being discussed)
Angry feminist student: Guys have it so easy! You can go out and fuck any girl you want and no one thinks any worse of you, but if a girl sleeps around she's a slut! Hell, if you somehow don't manage to nail the girl, you can just go home and masturbate. Girl's can't do that!
Female student who hadn't spoken a word all class: Pff, yes we can!
Penn State
Altoona, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: A guy in the same class
Drunk girl, walking over and planting big kiss on guy's forehead: I kissed you like I kiss my cat!
Guy: I don't like cats.
Emporia, Kansas
Overheard by: Very Disturbed
Volunteer #1: We can't be selling this music, it's devil worship.
Volunteer #2: Well, that's the ACLU. The ACLU ought to be abolished. They're why there's all this stuff around.
Customer: Why are you getting rid of that? Don't you think people ought to be able to choose for themselves?
Volunteer #2: Harry Potter is a witch!
Customer: I think we ought to get rid of Bush and Cheney, put them in jail–they're mass murderers!
Volunteers #1 & #2: (silence)
Joshua Tree Thrift Shop
California
Overheard by: Celeste Mann
High school girl #1: I'm so glad I only have one baby daddy. I feel sorry for those girls with more than one! You've gotta figure out who has money and who doesn't.
High school girl #2: That is so true!
Grocery Store
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Just doing my grocery shopping
Man: And there were women dressed as men who looked like little Japanese girls playing video games!
Boston Pizza, Toronto
Canadia
Swedish tourist: We came here for the chicken, but will remember it for the toilets.
Swiss Chalet
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Glad I didn't go downstairs…
Frat boy to another: It was the ugliest lipstick I've ever seen!
Cornell University
Ithaca, New York
Overheard by: Anna
Bartender: I've never seen someone drink ten Jägerbombs in 15 minutes before…you must be from hell.
Slightly drunk girl: No! I'm from New York. 10? That was 10? Oh, crap, 10 is a lot more than 3.
London
England
Soccer mom #1: I heard once that the reason animals don't live as long as humans is because they come into the world knowing how to love, and we have to learn.
Soccer mom #2: That is so true.
Lee County Humane Society
Auburn, Alabama
Overheard by: Gee
Painfully dull professor: It's not rocket science, but it's also not a marshmallow.
Storrs, Connecticut
