Now Could You Delicately Put That Switchblade Away?

Scary emo girl, pointing at friend: What am I? Say it! Say it! What am I? Say it!
Bullied emo guy, quietly: You're a delicate emo angel.

Federal Hill
Providence, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Katie M

Posted on April 10, 2010
Compliments, Girls, Guys, Questions, Rhode Island, Threats

I'm Your Parole Officer, Sir.

Man on cell: I'll see you then. You have a sexy voice… It's nice!

Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: ktjane

Posted on February 1, 2010
Compliments, Guys, On the phone, Oregon, Sexuality

Why the Gays Should Run the World

Delightfully gay and snarky flight attendant: Now, ladies, I am impressed with your Louis Vuitton and your coach. I adore your Prada and your Gucci. They are beautiful. But I will be more impressed with all of your bags if you stow them under the seat while we are landing. Now sit back and shut up.
(five minutes later, while plane is taxiing)
Delightfully gay and snarky flight attendant: We are finally here. So please, exit the plane a lot quicker than you boarded it. (plane stops, parks at gate) Get out.

Midway Airport
Chicago, Illinois

Posted on January 30, 2010
Airports & flights, Compliments, Fashion, Flight attendants, Grumpies, Illinois, Offers and requests, Queers

As Much As Any Six-Foot-Tall African American

Perky female voice: Do I look like Audrey Hepburn?
Reluctant male voice: Yes.
Perky female voice: Thanks!

Richmond, Virginia

Posted on December 4, 2009
Compare and contrast, Compliments, Guys, Questions, Virginia, Women

When Rappers Take SAT Prep Courses

Crazy lady to college kids making fun of her: You got finesse, use it! Don't you be so nonchalant.

Krystal
Birmingham, Alabama

Posted on December 2, 2009
Alabama, Compliments, Crazies, Students, Women, Words

Let's Hope That's a New Metal Band

11-year-old: Haggis is awesome!
15-year-old: Damn straight! High five!
(they high five)

NSW
Australia

Posted on November 21, 2009
Australia, Compliments, Teens, Tweens, Weirdness

You're Gonna Love Detroit, Sir

Social worker talking to hobo: What can I get for you, sir?
Hobo: How about a 9 mm semi-automatic gun?
Social worker: Well, I can't do that, but do you need bus tickets? Where are you going?
Hobo: Hell.
Social worker: Okay, I'll get those bus tickets then.
Hobo: Your hair's much nicer than mine.

Hospital
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: yooo