Not Today, Though– I've Got Leg Cramps

Hobo: Hey baby, you ever had the back a yo' knee fucked?
Girl in line at the show: Once…it was okay, I guess.
Hobo: Shitdamn girl, you're a freak!

Ybor
Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: Gotta try that

Posted on April 9, 2017
Body parts, Default, Florida, Girls, Hobos, Insults, Weirdness

Another Bloody Victory

Tall girl: Hurry up, I really have to pee.
Short girl in heels: Yeah, well, I'm about to hemorrhage through my skirt, so I win.

Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Posted on April 4, 2017
Clothes, Default, Girls, Gripes, Louisiana, Pee

This Girl Is My New Best Friend

Drunk girl in painful-looking heels to tour group of incoming freshmen: This is your future!

Michigan State University

Posted on April 1, 2017
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Education, Girls, Michigan

…In Unrelated News

Roomie #1: So, is your greatest strength still spooning?
Roomie #2: I told you, we're re not getting a cat!

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/430109662/to-spoon-with.html

Overheard by: roomie numero tre.

Posted on March 29, 2017
Animals, Compliments, Default, Friends, Overheard in Minneapolis, Questions

And What About “Moist”? Ewww.

12th grader, to no one in particular: You know what word I hate? “Spurt.” It just sounds dirty. Kind of like a tight budget. Something about a tight budget just isn't right.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/458963932/i-like-the-way-this-kid-thinks.html

Overheard by: neither of those were on the vocab list this week

Posted on March 27, 2017
Default

For…Y'know…Clean-Up.

Girlfriend to boyfriend, handing him a Kleenex: Well, it's only half used! I expected to use the other half myself.

Fairfax, Virginia

Posted on March 22, 2017
Default

In My Day, We Made Do with Electric Toothbrushes and Washing Machines

Woman #1: So, all these women are going skydiving now, because you can have an orgasm against the updraft.
Woman #2 (enthusiastically): Oh, that's great!

Olympic Sculpture Garden
Seattle, Washington

Posted on March 15, 2017
Default, Feelings, Gender issues, Orgasm, Washington, Women

In and Out, In and Out, All Night Long

Conductor: Mind the gap, doors closing. (train does not move) Those naughty, naughty doors.

London
England

Overheard by: ren

Posted on March 11, 2017
Advice, Conductors, Default, England, Offers and requests, Public transportation, Train

Who Are You?

Guy to girl: What? Your tummy hurts? Let’s make out!

Auburn, Alabama

Posted on March 2, 2017
Couples, Default, Foreplay, Maladies, Offers and requests

Time Gives White People the Illusion They Understand Black People

Professor talking about the Canterbury tales: So the friar has this gold pin he wears, he wears it under his neck to keep his hood closed . . . It's bling!
(class laughs)
Professor: I never want to hear anyone say I'm not up on the times. They had this article in Time magazine, it was an interview with a rapper, the guy's name was “fifty cents.”
(class laughs)
Professor: But I'm cool, and I know that it's not “fifty cents,” it's “fiddy.”

Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia

Posted on February 17, 2017
Books, Canadia, Class, Clothes, Default, Teachers, Words

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