Texting

Girl: T9 is responsible for so many mishaps. Once I tried to text someone “thanks for helping me”. Instead I typed “thanks for humping me.” It was bad!

Tacoma, Washington

Teen girl to friend: She doesn't even know what she wants! She just likes to text Scott because it makes her feel pretty.

Forever 21
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania

Very serious, very excited young woman: He's finally becoming a person! He got Facebook and he texts full-sized messages!

Owatonna, Minnesota

Overheard by: feels sorry for those without technology…

Guy to friend: So now I get text messages from her every day saying she wants to fuck on the hood of my car!

Lehigh University
Bethlehem, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Timbo

Ugly girl: So, what if I, like, texted him and said, ‘If you come out with us, I’ll have sex with you’?
Friend: You can’t do that.

Quincy Market bathroom
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Care

Young college girl #1: How was your date last night?
Young college girl #2: Okay. I don't think I'm going out with him again, though.
Young college girl #1: Why?
Young college girl #2: He was weird. He asked me to quit texting while we were having dinner.
Young college girl #1: Rude!

Starbuck's
Fayetteville, Arkansas

Girl: Kelly from work just texted me.
Guy: She's the really nice one, right?
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: Who's the one who's not nice?
Girl: Everyone else.

Frederick, Maryland

Middle-aged woman to friend: I will text the shit out of your ass, but I will not leave you a voicemail!

The Premiere Grill
Valparaiso, Indiana

Teen guy #1: Fuck, my girlfriend hasn't texted me back in over two hours!
Teen guy #2: Do you even have your phone on you?
Teen guy #1: No, it's in the car.

Upper Hutt
New Zealand

Overheard by: Schmitty

Slutty looking girl: I want to send a bulletin to all my male suitors: “you will not be getting into my pants by texting me and asking me to give you a back massage. The bum who told me god did a beautiful job making my legs this morning had a better chance.”

Ogilvie Train Station
Chicago, Illinois