…and Rent All the Cool Cars

Little girl: (talking over airport announcement)
Father: Quiet for a second!
Girl: (continues talking until announcement is over)
Father: Great. What if he was saying “Run! Zombies!”? We'll be sitting here like idiots while the zombies come…

O'Hare Airport
Chicago, Illinois

Posted on January 17, 2022
Airports & flights, Compare and contrast, Dads, Default, Family, Guys, Illinois, Offers and requests, Questions, Zombies

Can They Still Call It Martha Stewart Living?

Girl on cell: Wait… Wait! You’re telling me she’s not a zombie? You mean she’s actually dead?

Emory College
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Zack

Posted on January 16, 2022
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Death & dying, Default, Georgia, Girls, On the phone, Questions, Weirdness

…It'll Play the National Anthem.

Guy #1 to guy #2: Seriously, if you just gape her asshole wide enough…

Arcata, California

Overheard by: theonion

Posted on January 15, 2022
Default

Rosa Parks Was Definitely Chinese Though, Right?

7th-grade-boy to another: I didn't know Martin Luther King Jr. was black!

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/465741988/has-anyone-written-a-book-about-him-or-something.html

Overheard by: scared for the future of education.

Posted on January 15, 2022
Default, Family ties, Guys, Kids, Names, Overheard in Minneapolis, Race

The One with Big, Glossy Pictures Instead of Words

Man to store employee: It's one of those real estate investment books, the yellow ones.
Employee: Let's see, follow me… Is this what you were looking for?
Man: No, no, that's the one for idiots, I want the one for dummies.

Barnes & Noble
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Lisa

Posted on January 13, 2022
California, Compare and contrast, Customers, Default, Employees, Offers and requests, Stores, Words

That’s the Last Time I’ll Have an Orgy with a Family of Klutzes

Large woman: Your dad kicked me in the head!
Scrawny boyfriend: What?
Large woman: And then you kicked me in the head!

Fredericton, New Brunswick
Canadia

Overheard by: Marg

Posted on January 11, 2022
Canadia, Default, Family ties, Fat people, Gripes, Skinny people, Violence

This Affair with the Other White Meat Has Gone on Long Enough

Man, pulling out salad on airplane: Now I can get back to what really matters. Chicken.

Flight over Ft. Lauderdale, Florida

Overheard by: Nic

Posted on January 8, 2022
Airports & flights, Default, Feelings, Florida, Food, Guys

With the Possible Exception of the Dominant Chord

Professor: So, how was survey of western music?
Girl: It was terrible: someone would always find a way to bring up gender issues. I mean, I hate to break it to you, but eighteenth century tonal music doesn’t give a shit about your vagina.

Sarah Lawrence College
Bronxville, New York

Posted on January 7, 2022
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Gender issues, Girls, Gripes, Music, New York, Questions, Students, Teachers, Vagina, Words

You'd Rather Be Cheated on with Someone Ugly?

Hot girl: So when I finally met the girl he cheated on me with, I was in shock, because she was about a thousand times hotter than she looked on the picture I found.
Guy friend: Yeah. Well, some people are just not photogenic.
Hot girl: No, you don't understand! She's like supermodel hot, he had like no choice, even I would have fucked that Moroccan bitch right then and there.
Guy friend: That's so hot.
Hot girl: Life is not fair.

Starbucks

Posted on January 4, 2022
Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Friends, Girls, Guys, Infidelity, Restaurants, Sex

Still Doesn't Explain How the Entire Cast Fit on the Set Of Roseanne

Brunette: I don't think dinosaurs were ever real.
Blonde: Why is that?
Brunette: If they were really that big, only like ten could fit on earth. They wouldn't even be able to walk around much.
Blonde: Oh, you're probably right. I've never thought about it like that before.

Northern Michigan University

Posted on January 3, 2022
Animals, Colleges & Universities, Default, Girls, Michigan, Questions, Stupidity

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