New Yorkers-in-Training

Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, we're stopped here because Amtrak's having signal trouble. They're working on the line, but don't know how long it'll take. We could be here five minutes, we could be here fifty minutes.
Loudmouthed commuter: I don't believe this–the same fucking thing happened on Monday!
Even louder commuter: Why the fuck you gotta use language like that?
Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, let me remind you it is not the conductors' fault the train is stopped. We want to go home too, and we're stuck here on this train with you.

NJ Transit

Overheard by: Graceful Space

Posted on October 25, 2015
Employees, Etiquette, Insults, New Jersey, Public transportation

In the Nightmares Section

Man to salesperson in hippie bookstore: Hi I'm looking for a children's book about how chemicals and global warming are destroying the earth.
Salesperson: Oh, sure, it's right over here!

The Bookshelf
Guelph, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: The zoe

Posted on October 2, 2015
Books, Canadia, Default, Employees, Guys, Kids, Offers and requests, Stores

Does It Make a Sound?

Security guard: What do you do with a mailbox? You throw it in the middle of the woods!

Washington, DC

Overheard by: Elaine

Posted on August 26, 2015
Default, Employees, Questions, Threats, Washington, DC, Weirdness

But Not in That Slightly-Homoerotic Kirk Douglas Way

Ice cream lady behind counter: Spartacus?
Man running to get ice cream: I am Spartacus!

Oberweiss
Oak Park, Illinois

Posted on August 25, 2015
Default, Employees, Girls, Guys, Illinois, Names, Offers and requests, Questions

He Likes to Stand Out on the Porch and Shake a Stick at Trespassers

Tour guide: Where is your group going next?
Tourist: The Vatican.
Tour guide: Oh? You are lucky, the Pope is not there.

Florence
Italy

Overheard by: Burlabo

Posted on August 17, 2015
Christianity, Employees, Italy, Questions, Tourists

You're Right, That Is U.S. Foreign Policy

Waitress talking in the kitchen: I'm going to come back there and smack you till you smile. (now sings loudly) I'm going to come back there and smack you till you smile!

International House of Pancakes
Kansas

Posted on August 14, 2015
Default, Employees, Kansas, Restaurants, Violence, Weirdness

Early Elvis or Fat Elvis?

Clerk to another: And I woke up two days later by the pool, with Elvis.

Campmor
Paramus, New Jersey

Overheard by: Russ

Posted on August 13, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Names, New Jersey, Weirdness

This Would Be a Lot Less Creepy If You'd Take Off the Nixon Mask

Driver, with boat in tow: How much?
Toll booth operator, in a sing-songy tone: Seven-fiftyyyyy!
Driver: What?
Toll booth operator, sing-songy: Highway robberyyyyy!

Toll Booth, Florida Turnpike
Sunrise, Florida

Overheard by: Broke Commuter