Did You Know You Have No Lubrication Back There?

Girl: Sorry about the chafing. My butt still hurts when I poo.
Boy: [Makes sad face.]Girl: From your surprise. I don’t like your surprises.
Boy: It surprised me too!

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on July 7, 2023
Default, Etiquette, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Health & Hygiene, Massachusetts, Poop, Sensory experiences

Plus, Skinny Girls Won't Sit Still

Male student during history class: Why are the women in these nude paintings so plump?
Professor: Because the artists had good taste.
Female student: That's right!

University of Missouri

Overheard by: Kathryn Bjornstad

Posted on July 4, 2023
Diet & weight, Feelings, Missouri, Questions, Students, Teachers

Much Better Than That Stupid Mel Gibson Speech

Girl with fake sword to group of fifty kids with fake swords (prepping them before their war in the park): Today is not about living, today is about dying. You will die at least 100 times today. And you will love it!

Clark Park
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: afraid of kids

Posted on June 28, 2023
Death & dying, Default, Feelings, Games, Girls, Kids, Pennsylvania, Violence

You Have My Chalice in Your Purse!

College guy fighting with his girlfriend: What? Do you want me to tell you that my ex-girlfriend treated me like a Greek god? 'cause she did.
(girlfriend storms up the street)
College guy: Wait, uh, come back!

Burlington, Vermont

Posted on June 20, 2023
Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Frat boy types, Offers and requests, Questions, Relationships, Vermont

Lack of Recognition Is Our Thing

Crazy guy at bus stop to young woman passing: Hey, girl, what's going on?
(girl passes without saying anything) Yeah, that's my girl right there!

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Emily

Posted on June 19, 2023
Crazies, Default, Feelings, Guys, Illinois, Questions

They Call Her to Extinguish Volcanic Eruptions

Woman screaming into phone: You need to chill the fuck out!

San Francisco, California

Posted on June 12, 2023
Advice, California, Default, Feelings, Women

Is the Professor Actually Bugs Bunny in Disguise?

Undergrad, explaining why he can't answer a question: I'm just tired today. I'm sorry.
Very old professor, non-native English speaker: You are tired?
Student: Yes, I'm sick.
Very old professor: What disease do you have?
Student: I…uh, it's just a cold.
Very old professor: Yes, a cold is not considered disease. You are healthy. You are alive!

Classroom, University of Colorado
Boulder, Colorado