Woman in line at the bank: I am thinking about leaving him. All he does is lie to me!
Friend: Oh? Lie about what?
Woman: Well, yesterday he bought me some of that Nutella spread? He said it was chocolate, but I know for a fact that it's hazelnut!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Girl: I wonder why there are so many Japanese restaurants around here?
Guy: Probably because there are a lot of Mexican people living in this town.
Very Little Town
North Carolina
Girl to sister: The cheese is so good! It tastes like chicken!
Parenra
Houston, Texas
Girl to friends, emphatically: No, we have nipples so that we can milk our children!
Newton, Massachusetts
Guy: Where'd you go for lunch today?
Friend: Umm…I don't want to tell you.
Guy: Oh god, you went to Arby's, didn't you!
Friend, groaning: Yes.
Bar
Omaha, Nebraska
Female student: I feel like I have a really tough skin, because I was always teased by my dad from the moment I was born.
Male student (in very serious, philosophical tone): Scorn was your breast milk.
University of Southern California
Overheard by: Got milk?
Guy: Egg salad is a dish best served cold.
http://overheardinumcp.blogspot.com
Overheard by: alyssa
Girl on bus: I've been trying to quit drinking and she was all like, “have some juice with me!” And then she pulls out a half gallon of vodka, and I'm all, “bitch, what you doing?”
Seattle, Washington
Guy #1: Did you see the video where that girl shoots a banana out of her ass?
Guy #2: Yeah! And then she's like “I think there's still a strawberry up there!”
Clemson University
Clemson, South Carolina
Overheard by: starch
Woman: I wish I hadn't had hooters for breakfast!
Fitting Room
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
