Stoner teen girl watching seals: If I ever turn into an animal, I hope I’m not a seal.
Friend: Why?
Stoner teen girl: ‘Cause just look at the poor things — it’s so hard for them to, like, move. They just wobble everywhere. No legs to help them. I feel so bad for them.
Camden Aquarium
Camden, New Jersey
Overheard by: maryjane
Girl: But Gandhi — he, like, did so much for the world. He helped humanity.
Guy: Yeah, but we still shouldn’t have to write a paragraph about him.
Flint Hall, Syracuse University
Syracuse, New York
Overheard by: ears burning
Skinny sorostitute: Every time I see him he just makes me want to throw up.
Arizona State University
Arizona
Overheard by: Lindsay
Man to wife, thoughtfully: Everything south of San Francisco could just… just fall into the water, and it wouldn’t really matter.
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Catherine
Mother weighed down with shopping bags: Mummy needs a coffee now, honey.
Six-year-old daughter: But Mummy, I wanna look at–
Mother: –Mummy needs coffee or she will die.
Greensborough Plaza, Main Road
Greensborough
Australia
Girl #1: I'm having the worst day today.
Girl #2: Yeah, it's a good thing I had sex yesterday. Otherwise, today would just be hell.
Seattle, Washington
Chick: Well, my mom wouldn’t let me on the train until I wore pants, so there ya go.
Southmoor station
Aurora, Colorado
