Girl: I’m not a nerd.
Boy: Yeah, you are.
Girl: Well, if I’m a nerd, you’re a nerd.
Boy: No, I’m not.
Girl: Yes, you are.
Boy: No. Being a nerd is not a transitive property!
University of Chicago
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: not a nerd
Black lady #1: So I said, ‘What are you gonna do, hit me?’
Black lady #2: Mmm-hm.
Black lady #1: Then he really started to trip…
Black lady #2: Mmm.
Black lady #1: That’s when I looked him right in the eye and I said, ‘One of us is gonna die tonight.’
Joliet Mall
Joliet, Illinois
Airport PA: Will the man with his pants around his ankles please return to Security and retrieve your belt?
Chicago Midway Airport
Chicago, Illinois
Fashionable girl on cell: Do you think you can catch pink eye from getting poop in your eye?
Chicago, Illinois
Guy in leopard-print cowboy hat to woman holding homemade desserts and guy in yarmulke: I've been eating nothing but crap all week and every time I say I don't want to eat anymore! Someone put a brownie in front of me!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Burbgirl
Guy #1: I loved the way you fucked me last night.
Guy #2: I can't wait to do it again, tonight.
Guy #1: Mmmm, I'm getting hot just thinking about it.
Annoyed woman sitting in front of them: You two fools do realize everyone on the bus can hear you, don't you?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: CTA bus rider
