Crazy homeless lady to well-dressed businessman: Look at you with the coffee, you faggot, you just love dick in your ass!
Starbucks
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: trying to avoid her wrath
Crazy homeless lady to well-dressed businessman: Look at you with the coffee, you faggot, you just love dick in your ass!
Starbucks
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: trying to avoid her wrath
Guy: Well, how could you tell I was drunk?
Girl: Because you were actually funny.
Guy: Well, you were actually attractive.
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Super Mike
Very obnoxious drunk man to long-suffering waitress: Hey, what’s your name, anyway?
Waitress (coldly): Melissa.
Drunk man (softly): Awww, my daughter’s name is Melissa.
Waitress: Well, I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but we usually turn out slutty.
Bar
Los Angeles, California
Big burly man, earnestly: So then he said, “my wife is in labor,” but I didn't exactly know what that meant.
English man, in disbelief: What? What did you think it meant?
Big burly man: I dunno… Um, like, just pregnant?
English man: So what did you say?
Big burly man: I just said, “yeah, that sucks for you.”
English man: Wow, he must have thought you were a real asshole.
Big burly man: Haha, yeah. And then she had the baby in the apartment.
(long pause)
Big burly man: So, anyway, now the building's hot water's not working.
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: trying not to laugh
Girl: I think the live-action of GTO is so much better.
Guy: I think the live action of your mom is so much better.
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Drunk girl screaming: No one here cares about any of the issues. None of you are from here. That just makes me sick, none of you are fucking from here.
Bus driver over PA: Sweetie, unless your name is Pocahontas, you're not from here either.
NJ Transit Bus
Girl on cell: So, like, I refused her. I told her I'm not friends with whores.
Salisbury, Maryland
Man with sons and wife: We made good time. Only took an hour.
Wife, getting angry: Would you stop letting people know how ignorant you really are?
Man: So what? We did the Louvre in 45 minutes.
Reina Sofia Museum
Madrid
Spain
Overheard by: amy abes
