Preppy guy: You’re such a bitch, Alexandra.
Alexandra: Thanks?
Preppy guy: No, in a good way.
Alexandra: How can you be a bitch in a good way?
Preppy guy: You’re the kind of bitch that makes me wish I was gay so we could sit at an outside cafe and make fun of people’s outfits when they walk by.
Starbucks, Newbury Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: i want to, too!
Small child: Mmm! Oooh! Mmm! Mommy, that feels good when it comes out!
Mother, whispering: Shut up.
Restroom, Tanglewood
Lenox, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Stephanie
Cute girl to suit: What are you drinking?
Suit: Absolut on the rocks.
Cute girl: I prefer Belvedere.
Suit: Are you trying to get a free drink?
Cute girl to bartender: May I please have a Chopin Martini, up with olives? (points to suit, then turns back to him) Go fuck yourself. (walks away)
Hotel Bar
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: arrc
Random guy: It's like I'm on the Pony Express or something…and I'm the pony!
Harvard Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Professor: Let's move on…let's talk about Puerto Ricans in New York. And crack. And race. Well, let's start with Obama.
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
Overheard by: lovecollege
Hipster girl to boyfriend: Tanya is either wasted or at the Home Depot — there’s no in-between.
Beacon Hill
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Michael
Fabulous shopping man to another: That's the thing about happiness! Even if I had some, I wouldn't know where to put it!
Boston, Masscahusetts
Overheard by: surprisingly happy
Chemistry professor, demonstrating suction filtration: … And you have to stop the cock before you turn on the water, or it will just [frantic hand motion] come all over your face.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: amused non-major
17-year-old mom: And she thought that you were my mom!
18-year-old friend, gesturing to baby: Wait… so is this your sister or my grandchild?
Northampton, Massachusetts
Woman, urinating and talking to friend in next stall: I was holding my piss in for so long, my Kegel muscles could choke a chicken!
Memorial Hall
Monson, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sarah
