Moms

Seven-year-old boy to mom: So, mom, all the kids in camp were making fun of this one boy cuz he was a stinky Yankees fan and we're all Mets fans!
Mom: Honey, if mommy can marry a Republican, than you can be friends with a Yankees fan.

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Laura

Little boy: Mommy, come here! I have a present for you!
(mom comes over, little boy proceeds to dump a bucket of water over her head).
Little boy: Did you like it?
Mom: No.
(little boy dumps another bucket of water on her head)

Neighborhood Pool
New Jersey

Overheard by: CMac

Man: So how's your baby?
Young woman: Great. He's three months old now, so he's no longer just a glorified fetus! He has emotions, and everything!
(pause)
Man, awkwardly: Oh. Huh, how about that?

Mohonk Resort
New Paltz, New York

Overheard by: Ali

Old woman to daughter: And now she's got no money cause she blew it all on muffins.

Supermarket
Sydney

Overheard by: Anny

Geeky kid: A glass cutter? Oh. My. God. This is a glass cutter! It cuts glass!
(mom tries to shush him)
Geeky kid, whispering: A glass cutter!

Hardware Store
San Francisco, California

Woman to mother being slapped in the rear by little boy: Oooh, your son is bad!
Mother: Yeah, I think he's gonna be an ass man when he grows up!

Jersey City
New Jersey

Mother, to four-year-old daughter looking at birthday party decorations: What kind of birthday party do you want, honey? Princess? Dora?
Four-year-old daughter: Red.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Sarah

Mother to kid: Stop that right now, or I'm going to give you to a stranger!
Stranger: Good luck finding one who'll take her.

The Baltimore Aquarium
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Cols

Judge: The police found drugs in your house?
Mother: It was just a little crack, and it was only there for two days.

Ulster County, New York

Teen daughter: Mom, what does an orgasm feel like?
Mom, looking at older daughter: Ask your sister, she'd probably know better than I would.

Portland, Oregon