Mr. Miyagi Taught Him How, in the First Movie.

Student: What would Elvis say?
Professor: What would Plato say?
Student: What would Butler say?
Campbell: What would Foucault say?
Girl in back row: All I know is he broke a table.

University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia

Overheard by: elvis eavesdropper

Posted on October 14, 2009
About celebrities, Colleges & Universities, Education, Philosophy, Questions, Students, Teachers, Virginia

Bottom Line: It Tastes Like Shit.

Guy: You!
Smoking, unsuspecting girl: Me? What'd I do?
Guy: Do you know how lonely it's been since you and Dave* quit smoking? Then everyone started to quit! And now you're smoking again?! At first it was all cute: “Awwww, Emily and Dave* are quitting together! They're like each other's rocks!” Then what happened?!
Smoking girl, sheepishly: We sunk.
Guy: And was it your idea for Dave to start rolling his own cigarettes?!
Smoking girl: Yes…
Guy, exasperated: Every time I ask him for a cigarette, it's like smoking a diaper!

New Jersey

Posted on October 13, 2009
Compare and contrast, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Health & Hygiene, New Jersey, Questions, Relationships, Smokers, Smoking

You've Got a Name Tag Pinned to Your Sweater

Aunt Sherry: You have to hold my hand or else I might get lost. Then, what will happen?
Sassy preschooler: You'll be alright, aunt Sherry.

Northville, Michigan

Overheard by: older sassy girl

Posted on October 11, 2009
Family, Family ties, Kids, Michigan, Questions, Weirdness

Your Editors Feel a Fierce College Nostalgia Coming on

Girl to girl and guy: Guys, can I just tell you about my weekend?
(no reply)
Girl again: Can I tell ya'll about my weekend?
(they look at her and nod)
Girl again, whispering: It had to do with a penis…

UNCC Campus
Charlotte, North Carolina

Posted on October 11, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Comebacks, Girls, Guys, North Carolina, Penis, Questions

…And It Fulfills Your Science Requirement?

College freshman girl: Wait… wait… Dinosaurs and vaginas!? (pause) Oh, now I get it!

Olympia, Washington

Overheard by: prefers dinosaurs

Posted on October 10, 2009
Animals, Questions, Students, Vagina, Washington

…And a Photo Of My Face Drooling White Liquid?

Greek mythology professor: So, why is there a flying penis on the screen?

Amherst, Massachusetts

Posted on October 9, 2009
Education, Massachusetts, Penis, Questions, Teachers

…You and I Are, Like, Soulmates!

Dopey girl #1: Have you seen the movie Sweet Sixteen? I mean, Sixteen Candles?
Dopey girl #2: Yeah!
Dopey girl #1: Yeah! Oh my god!

High School
La Jolla, California

Overheard by: God

Posted on October 7, 2009
California, Girls, Idiots, Movies, Names, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Stupidity

Or Jail, Yeah

Teenage girl #1: Anyway, I just need to talk to him.
Teenage girl #2: Mmm-hmm.
Teenage girl #1: But I barely ever see him!
Teenage girl #2: Yeah.
Teenage girl #1: I have to meet him in a mutual place, y'know?
Teenage girl #2: …like a box?

Perth
Australia